About a Loser

Chapter 6

Loser's point of view

I've heard them call her Crazy, and even though I've only just met her for the first time this morning, she has already more than earned her name, because I feel like I'm going insane.

I still haven't figured out what I did wrong this morning, and it bothers me. Like – a lot. I take a deep breath before I start another 200, trying to focus on the pain in my legs, in my lungs, in my whole body.

It usually works. You can't really think about girls and stuff if you're feeling like your feet might fall of any moment now.

Not today though. As soon as I stop, my eyes automatically shift over to the other side of the track where the girls are still running.

Just her and Blisters, that is. Because all the others have already given up.

It doesn't help, not a bit, that she's apparently got a mindset to be matched. Damn it, even I'm pretty close to giving up at this point. I can't though, I tell myself, and, gritting my teeth, I turn around to do another 200. It's not even because I need the workout, just because I won't leave this track before she does.

I still haven't got a clue what offended her so much that she stormed out of that McDonalds faster than most people run during a sprint workout. From the look on her face, I might as well have been an ugly man-sized spider who eats cute kittens for breakfast and has come to rape her pet dog.

I mean, sure, she slipped and dropped her burger, that wasn't the best start into the day. I would have been pissed if I was her. She's not the type for pissed, though, I could see it on her face. For some girls, when they're embarrassed, their cheeks will turn just that certain shade of pink, barely noticeable – yeah, that's not her at all. Pretty sure she went all the way to traffic-light within a matter of milliseconds. It's adorable, if you ask me – but then again, everything about the way she slipped and dropped her burger was, sort of.

Well, except for the part where I turned into a fat ugly spider in her mind, that is a bit uncalled for. I honestly can't explain why that would have happened, and I've gone over it in my mind more often than I could have cared to count already.

I saw her drive to school after, and probably turned into the creep that she thinks I am when I followed her without even buying anything.

To be fair, I wasn't going to buy anything in the first place, and I was only following her to ask her what was wrong, but then stuff got into the way, I guess. Honestly, I can be such a dumb piece of shit, I don't understand myself sometimes.

I was just gonna go sit in the parking lot for a while, give myself time to wake up – I like to do that. I know it's kind of crazy, but I enjoy getting up early and watching everyone else start their day. But then she went in, and I was curious, just because we never get new people at Red Oak, especially since school still isn't back on yet. That hoodie she was wearing meant she had to be on the team, which, in itself, is a good enough reason to be curios, so I followed her in, and then shit happened, I guess, and I somehow turned into a fat ugly spider. I was gonna go after her and talk to her, give her some time to calm down first, but then she basically ran into the changing rooms, and it's not like I'd leave a good first impression barging in there like some kind of pervert creep. Well, it would have been a bad second impression, I guess. Not like I haven't already messed up the first one.

I finish another 200 and can't help glancing over when I hear Blisters, sounding kind of panicked, asking her if she's okay.

What the hell?

I run over to check on her. Nothing special, I tell myself, it's what I'd do if anyone else was injured as well.

But then I remember that for some reason she hates me and dealing with me is probably the last thing she needs right now. Besides, it's gonna be hard enough making friends with her if she isn't already mentally connecting me to whatever just happened.