Finding Hades a Consort

The Contract

Hades smiled at me happily and he almost looked handsome, in a weird way, “Fantastic, I’ll go get a contract all set up so everyone knows this is legit, I’ll send it to you via cherub in a couple of hours so you have time to talk to Zeus,” he sniggered, “I doubt he’ll be happy about it, and you can take your little Persephone home.”

As soon as he said her name, my best friend appeared behind him. Her long blonde hair and sparkly blue eyes practically shining, her pixie-like face lighting up now that she was out of the Underworld. Persephone screamed in joy and ran towards me, engulfing me in a huge hug. “Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh Nemesis! I’ve missed you so much!” she gushed. I laughed and smiled at Persephone, she’s so cute. She’s older than me and all but she can be so childish sometimes, it’s adorable. I turned round to see that Hades had gone, so that means I’ve got to get back home and speak with Zeus quickly, before I have to go, he’s sooo not going to be impressed.

 “Sephy, darling, how are you? Are you hurt? By the gods if you’re hurt, fuck the contract and I’ll take revenge on him, I swear I will.” I said using my nick name for her.

“What contract Nemmy?” she asked confusedly, “Oh my god. Please don’t tell me you made a stupid deal with that evil butt face just to free me.” Persephone practically growled at me.

I smiled sheepishly at her and then looked at the ground, “Maybe, but it’s worth it. I get to go to the human world. And besides, Cronus begged me to get you back home and I can’t say no to him, he’s like a brother to me.” It was the truth, her boyfriend, Cronus, was like my adoptive big brother so it’s really hard for me to say no to him. “Anyways, darling, we have to get home. I have to talk to your dad and then get ready to go,” I carried on before she could give me a lecture, she’s really good at those.

“Fine, but just so you know I’m mad at you.” Persephone said in a huff.

I laughed inwardly and reached for her hand. I closed my eyes and started to visualise home, manifesting the palace. Starting with the sight, I visualised the glass walls and shiny floors, then what it smells like and I smelt the scent of the wind, just before the rain, then what home sounds like, everyone talking and laughing in their angelic voices, and I imagined what home feels like, happy, safe, content and lastly, I imagined what it tastes like, like honey and milk all smooth and creamy. I always feel weird imagining the taste but if you don’t, your manifesting isn’t going to work. I opened my eyes slowly to check if I was home and TA-DA! I was back, and so was Persephone. It still amazes me how awesome I am, I can pretty much be a god. Oh wait I am.

I looked around what I call my home and found that nearly everyone was in the common room of our glass palace. It seems that everyone already knew that I’d get Persephone home. Geez pressure much? What if I came home without her? Cronus interrupted my inner musings by running forwards and attacking every inch of Persephone’s face with his lips, then very inappropriately, devouring her mouth in a kiss that should be X-rated or something, geez I don’t think that a kiss like that should even be legal, let alone witnessed by everyone.

I cleared my throat as loud and as obnoxiously as I could, it’s wonderful that they’re united again and everything but it’s kind of depressing seeing as I have no one to welcome me home like that. Not that I want anyone, I prefer being alone. The loved-up couple sprang apart and gave everyone guilty looks and muttered a sorry each with blushing faces. Everyone then chose that moment to disperse and go on about their own business. I giggled like a mad woman because I’ve never seen Persephone and Cronus look like guilty or blush. They both shot me evil glares and then walked off in the other direction.

“WOW YOU ARE SURELY THE GRATEFUL BIG BROTHER AREN’T YOU? IT’S NOT LIKE I JUST SAVED YOUR GIRLFRIEND OR ANYTHING!” I shouted after them, planning on making Cronus feel bad about abandoning me without even saying anything. He knows what happens when no one thanks me, my power starts to play up. Stupid power. Speaking of power, I could feel mine rising. “YOU’RE WELCOME BY THE WAY!” I kept shouting trying to get a response other than seeing their retreating backs. When I was about to give up, Cronus appeared next to me, sneaky little loser, he manifested himself next to me.

“Thank you sooo much Nemmy, I don’t know what you did to get her back but thank you,” he said quietly, giving me a kiss on my cheek and disappearing to be with Persephone.

I looked around the common room and wondered when that cherub that Hades was talking about would appear, I’d rather have the contract now and know the exact terms before I saw Zeus. As if thinking about him somehow summoned him, a chubby little cherub appeared in front of me all cheery and smiley with giant baby blue eyes and cute little blushing cheeks and a scroll in his hand. He stretched his chubby arm that was holding the scroll out to me and offered me a adorable little smile that only toddlers could achieve, “Nemesis, Hades has sent me to assure that you receive this agreement and to assure him that you have signed and agreed to the terms,” the little kid said sounding funny being all professional, he should sound like a baby not an adult. I smiled at him, I wonder if he has a name, maybe I should ask him, the little voice in my head said.

“Thank you, may I ask your name?” I asked as sweetly as I could while unrolling the scroll to read over what Hades had wrote.

“Dorian Nabu is my name, miss. But everyone calls me Dori.” He replied cheerily, watching me as I read over the contract.

The contract stated the I had three months in which to find Hades a consort, I have to change my name so I won’t be suspicious – I have to add a last name, most gods and goddesses don’t have last names but humans do, so he could keep track of where I was and who I was contemplating I will be assigned one of his minions, Caine. And if I should not find anyone or bring him home a consort, I shall offer myself as his consort – WAIT WHAT?! Oh hell no. I am definitely going to find this bitch a consort. I am totally not going to ever be Hades’s consort. My inner voice started raging. On the outside I was smiling and turned to Dori, “What shall I sign it with?”

He handed me a needle, “I’m sorry miss, but Hades specified that it be signed in blood, therefore there are no confusions or complications.” He answered sadly.

I looked at the needle, I love blood. As long as it’s not mine. Ugh I’m totally going to throw up, I thought as I took the needle and pricked my finger. I Let the blood drop onto the line above my name and had to swallow down the urge to vomit. Dori smiled sadly at me and pulled out another magical little contract, “Miss, I’m truly sorry, but Hades needs a copy as well, so if you could please just drop a little blood over here, we’ll be done and you can be on your way.”

I scowled at the little boy, he’s lucky my powers see this as just. I quickly let a drop fall onto the second piece of paper and bid him goodbye, walking away to my quarters. If that’s the last time I ever have to bleed, I’ll be the happiest goddess in the universe, my mind said. As I was passing everyone they all stopped to look at me, what are they looking at? I thought, just as that thought passed through my mind, Zeus’s voice boomed across the palace,

“Nemesis, to my throne room. Now.”

Boy, he does not sound happy.