Play Pretend - Bucky Barnes

Part 6

The Christmas party brought no new information but plenty of drama.

You split ways after the song finished; Bucky left to get drinks and you went to the toilet. You threw a glance back and watched him engage in conversation with some colleagues as if nothing had happened. Oh, how you wished you could do the same.

You made your way to the empty bathroom stopping in front of the mirror to inspect your flustered state. Except for your flushed cheeks, nothing about your appearance showed the frazzled state of your mind. Never in your life would you have thought you would spend days wondering about a guy's feelings for you. You were used to being forward, but usually, you were also completely positive about where they were standing with you. With Bucky, every sign had to be questioned. Was it for the mission or a genuine sign of affection? Being fake married made everything ten times harder.

You spent a few minutes inside the bathroom trying to calm your racing heart and thoughts before leaving. You immediately wished you hadn't or that you could erase the sight that met you.

Hands in hair. Hands on the waist. Bodies pressed tightly together. Lips locked.

You thought the evening couldn't get worse, but oh, how wrong you were. Amy had Bucky pressed up against the wall, kissing him like her life depended on it. You couldn't see his face but that was probably for the best. You wouldn't be able to watch his face filled with pleasure.

Involuntary tears filled your eyes as you hurried away. How could you be foolish enough to believe he wanted to kiss you? You should have seen the signs - you were supposed to be trained for this. This didn't seem like Bucky but in your anger and heartbreak, it didn't matter. All that mattered was the smirk you could imagine on Amy's face and her voice taunting you, "He will never love you."

How had the evening come to this?

The slam of the bathroom door brought Bucky out of his stupor. He had gone searching for you when he got ambushed by Amy. She cornered him as he frantically looked for you - looked for an escape. He needed to get away. He rejected all her attempts but she didn't mind. At last, she grabbed him pushing her body onto him. He grabbed her waist instinctively only pushing her away the moment he realised her lips felt wrong. Nevertheless, it was too late. He watched the back of your figure running away before he could even react.

"What the hell?"

Amy grinned trailing a hand down in chest, "I've seen how you look at me and frankly I'm not surprised when you've got that hideous beast of a wife. It must be tough to know you could have gotten someone so much better."

His eyebrows furrowed in anger brushing her hand away, "Don't you dare talk about her like that. She is the most beautiful person on this earth. And even if she wasn't, I would still love her. 'Cause you know what, it's what on the inside that counts." He ran a hand through his hair trying to brush the feeling of Amy's hands away.

"She's beautiful on both the inside and outside, something I see you struggle with." He turned to leave but stopped a few steps away. "and if anyone is a 'hideous beast' it's you."

The smirk that had adorned her face slipped off and she watched him walk away with cold eyes.

You couldn't wait for the day to be over. Bucky had the keys to the car so walking home was your only option. Your emotions seemed to affect the weather, only a minute after you stepped out it started pouring down. Your tears mixed with the rain and together they streamed down your face.

You were drenched by the time you got home. Exhaustion filled your bones and after a hot shower, you were out cold.

You didn't hear Bucky come home or his heart break as he observed the way you curled into yourself facing the wall instead of him.

The next morning when you woke up, you wondered briefly why you couldn't feel the warmth of Bucky 'til all the memories of last night hit you.

He was curled on up on his side, his hand stretched towards your side like it was reaching for you.

You shook the thought away. He didn't like you and most importantly didn't have to like you. It was hard to remember at times but you weren't actually his and he wasn't yours. You didn't have the right to feel betrayed but it didn't stop you. With one last longing glance, you left the room to start cooking breakfast.

You felt his presence before he made himself known. His footsteps were light but his aftershave rolled into the room like waves. It was a mixture of cinnamon and nutmeg with a hint of wood. It was very calming but the underlying scent of him was what made it perfect. Your inside ached with sadness and the feeling of loss. His scent brought back memories of happier times; cuddling in bed, holding hands and kissing...

He quietly grabbed some plates placing them on the table. Something you had learned about Bucky was that he was good at reading moods. He could probably already tell from last night that the atmosphere had changed, and therefore he didn't try to give you your morning cheek kiss.

Breakfast was eaten in silence only interrupted by an unfamiliar ringtone. Bucky was just as confused before a light of recognition was cast on his face. He came back into the room holding a sleek silver phone.

He answered your silent question, "I pickpocketed this out of Amy's bag last night."

The sound of her name coming out his lips reminded you of what took place last night and how she was locked tight to those lips.

You hide all emotions behind a carefully placed wall only letting curiosity be known.

"Let me have a look." You held your hand out purposely not touching his hands as you grabbed the phone. A part of you wanted to smash the phone into a thousand pieces but another part knew it would be much more satisfying to bring her down for good.

"I gotta go to work but let me know what you find out." He hesitatingly leant forward before ultimately deciding against it.

The house felt empty once he left.

The phone sat on the table taunting you as you washed the plates clean. Finally, enough was enough and you brought out your computer ready to hack into the phone.

It didn't take long to crack the passcode but once you were in came the difficult stuff. Every message and e-mail was written in code.

Great, I need to decode it all, too. This will take some time.

You ran it through a program SHIELD had provided you with hoping it could find some patterns. Luckily, you didn't need to do it yourself or else this would have taken much longer.

About an hour later a ping notified you it was done decoding. It took you some time to search through the hundreds of messages and e-mails for relevant bits but you managed to find some interesting pieces of information.

It seemed the weapon was some sort of biological weapon that would infect people with an unknown disease. They would negotiate with the cure in turn for more power and the ability to operate freely on American ground. The only thing missing was when and where this would take place.

An hour later a message popped into her phone and was soon decoded. Shit, you thought as you read it.

The attack will be exucuted tomorrow at 5 PM. Be ready.

You needed to hurry up and find the cure. It would do nothing to find the weapon as they probably could make more at the matter of no time. The cure was your best hope.

You would have to break in today and right now. The Williams were currently out on their weekly grocery shopping trip, so now would be the perfect time to slip in and out.

You didn't have time to wait for Bucky to get home. By the time he would be back, so would they, and your chances would be ruined. No, you had to go in on your own. Besides, it wasn't like you weren't trained for this. What could go wrong?