In Royal Heels

Achievement complete: Another day, Another prank

"Ok please j-just...please I'm sorry" he stammered, oh that whore of a bitch is gonna get his ass kissed... He'd usually like that... But not by my revenge. And by my revenge I mean my lovely prank.

He moved his fingers through his hair "we can talk it through babe" he said in a creepy tone that somehow made the cheerleaders melt. People with an IQ of an ice cube can melt easily to his voice, no pun intended.

But shit hit the fan as soon as he dared to eye twitch to me, I think they call it eye wink? Nah whatever it's not like I can tell a difference. But I'm gonna swipe that mouth twitch or what they refer to as "smirk" off his sorry face.

"What are you thinking about babe?" He said and here we go with the melting, and you wonder why aliens never visit us."remember to count till ten before acting babe"

I let out a sarcastic laugh and snapped at him "well babe, you should've counted to ten before you dare try hacking into my phone, or even touching my phone, let alone looking at my phone!" Yes I'm that possessive.

He was so still, like a board, like comparing him to a board would be an insult to the boards...but he sure looked like one. Scrolling through his phone, I found the one and only "my contacts"...the magical place where the pranks are born.

"I wonder when is the last time you called your maaaaamy" I whined and checked to see it was last month "it's been a loooooong time! She must be worried, I'm gonna check on her... But because we have a wonderful amazing crowd I'm gonna put it on speakers, I mean they're here for a reason." Ok with some paint he could be mistaken for a wall...not a board, heck a board can move more than him right now.

"Any objections?" I added playfully, not that I will respond to any objections and I guess everyone knew that because what I'm hearing right now is my mind saying while grinning evilly let's do this.

*few minutes later*

"... and then he peed on himself, again!" By the time her mom ended one of marky boo childhood stories, my stomach was hurting me. I laughed and clapped like a retarded seal, but I wasn't the only one...the rest of the high school were suffering as well. Through my vision that was blurry with tears I see a red object....oh wait... Can it be marky boo's face?

When I found the power to talk like a sober human being, I bid her goodbye and then she said, "oh it was nice talking to you, bye dear and tell marky boo to change his pants everyday...I have a feeling he doesn't" After I finished the phone call I can imagine my grave written on it: rip Evelyn Mathews: death by laughter.

And before me ,or my dead body, stands Mark Hemmings, you know that guy who thought he tried to hack through my phone and get away with it and now he is the most humiliated person on earth, all thanks to his mom!

But thanks to me he used to be known as Manwhore Hemmings since the beginning of the school year....I guess you could guess why I gave him his name. But the past is in the past, I have found a new update for his name "Manwhore boo!" I announced as I heard another fit of laughter...
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"Omg when she mentioned how he used to walk around naked!!" Emily said before she lost herself in laughter while walking to our homes, "that was a golden one, how about we add it to the LLP"

The LLP stood for "list of legit pranks" whenever I'm down I always read it. "No it wasn't that legit, I honestly think I was too kind" I said before I turned to a shocked Emily "ok ok it was badass but it was not as badass as the badassness of what is in the LLP" I added.

Oh I forgot I'm talking to "mother Emily" who hates swearing and words like ass. And now I'm greeted by a deadly glare from her "oh c'mon, it's a body part you know; hand, face, legs,...ass?" It came more like a question from me. Even though I can say stuff that made no sense, I will do anything to escape the dark pit of the Emily Jordan's lectures of the deep.

During her lecture that she gave me anyways, I smiled to myself. Rule number one in my life is making myself clear while enjoying it. I'm the Evelyn Mathews and what happened to Manwhore poo over there is a sign to never underestimate me.

"So are you fully convinced that you were absolutely wrong about choosing such an inappropriate word?" Emily's stern question snapped me out of my thoughts, I don't want to be rude... Or in other words make her mad because I didn't listen to her that will cause this lecture to be extra longer than the wall of china. "Yes I'm terribly sorry" I replied with a cheeky smile....