For One Night Only (Part 1)

For One Night Only - Part I

I sit down at the table exhausted. I woke up early and cleaned my entire house from top to bottom, including the kid's rooms. Mama took the boys for the weekend. She said she was giving me some much needed time to myself. But that's the last thing I need.

When I'm alone all I do is think about him. He invades my mind at every waking moment. His face even invades my dreams. Forcing me to face the fact that he's no longer here upon rising every morning. My sons kept me occupied. Their laughter serving as a distraction to the bitter loneliness that aches away deep inside.

When the kids are around, I'm not alone. I'm not alone to think about him and everything that could have been. I know I shouldn't dwell on the past and what I thought my future was destined to be. I mean it's been over a year since he left. Left me all alone to take care of two growing boys on my own.

Granted the days were getting better. I could now get through the day without crying. I could hear his name without becoming enveloped in a cloud of grief and despair. But other things were getting worse.

I was getting an itch. Aitch that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't scratch. The itch started a few weeks ago as a deep aching low in my belly. And the feeling was growing. The ache was now a dull throbbing between my legs.

I was on fire with need. The need for a man. The need for sexual release. The need to feel like a woman again.

But how do you go about satisfying such a need when you're trying to raise two young boys on your own? Where do you find the time? Lord knows I've tried. There wasn't a dildo big enough, wide enough to fill that emptiness I was feeling, no sex toy adequate enough to satiate my growing desires.

I was ablaze, aflame. I needed a man in my bed. Someone who could help me feel whole again and not think about him, even if only for one night.

I pick up my cell phone and scroll through the contacts. Should I? What did I have to lose? Sure my pride might be a little damaged if I'm rejected, but at this point, I don't care. I have to try.

I pull up his information and type in the words. You free this evening? Want some company?

I tap my leg against the freshly mopped tile floor, waiting for a reply in angst. It's been a long time since I needed to search for a lover. Since I needed to put the word out that I was able and more than willing to spread my thighs.

That's because he had always been there. For eleven years he had been there. There to lick me in just the right place, to tease and to taste, to tantalize me in each and every way.

Now I had no one to keep my bed warm at night. My sheets were as cold as my broken heart.

My phone beeps, new message received. With shaking fingers, I open the message. Sure sweet mama. What you got in mind?

Butterflies flutter about in my stomach, causing my belly to lurch up and back down again.

Nothing special. Feel like staying in? Why don't you come on over around 8. I send the message with instant regret. I was being fast and loose. Wasn't I? Setting up some kind of booty call with a man I barely know.

The reality was I wasn't hot to trot. I was lonely. Lonely and disconnected from that part of me that made me feel like a woman.

Ok. Cool. Should I bring anything?

Oh yeah, he could bring something. Something thick and hard, but I dare not reply with such a thing. No, just your body? I answer with a smirk. Please do bring that body. And my what a body it was, I think to myself.

The man was a tall drink of water. Well over 6 feet, with ebony skin that seemed to gleam in any lighting. His features masculine with a strong jaw his body good and toned from all the hours he spent in the gym.