Affairs Of The Heart

✔ T R E N T A S E T T E

Chapter 37

Iris' Pov

My eyes snaps open and I fly up into a sitting position, grasping the sheets as I pant hard, drenched in my own sweat. Brushing the sticky hair from my face and neck, I groan rubbing my face.

I sigh heavily trying to calm myself down.

It's just a dream, I chant over and over in my head.

She isn't here anymore, she's dead.

Thanks to Arsenio.

Pushing the covers aside, I glance casually over at the vacant space by my side. Only the tousled white sheets can be seen, Luca must have already gotten up to do his usual morning exercise ritual.

I throw my legs over the side, my toes sinking into the soft carpet as I pad my way into the bathroom.

Two fingers massaging my temple as I try to alleviate the pounding in my head. Glancing in the mirror, I scowl at my appearance especially at the bags under my eyes.

I've barely had any sleep, Lila plagues my dreams, haunting me with lifeless vivid green eyes. She blames for her death, and well, I blamed me for her death too. I could have done more, but I didn't I couldn't.

God, I'm losing my fucking mind.

It didn't help much either that Luca refuses to tell me what was going to happen to her body, he only gives his usual vague answers, answers that irk the shit out of me. I couldn't fathom why it was he wouldn't tell me what I wanted to know? It was like he could only see a fragile girl who couldn't handle it.

It makes me think though maybe Lila wasn't so crazy after all, I mean she certainly opened my eyes to things unbeknownst to me. Shit, she is seriously fucking with my brain even from the grave.

I'm thinking myself into a frenzy that's what I'm doing.

Running my finger along the horizontal scar on my cheek, I shake my head, popping the medicine cabinet open and extracting the ibuprofen pill bottle, shaking two red pills into my open palm.

Knocking them back with a drink of water from the bathroom tap, I close my eyes, inhaling deep before opening my eyes once again. Scratching my head I take one last look at my sleep-deprived face.

I don't feel like me anymore. I don't even look like me.

My eyes have lost their brightness and seems to have sunken into my face, I have huge dark under eye circles and my face has definitely slimmed down. My hair is as thin as paper and I look as sick as a dog, basically I looked like death itself.

Cupping my hands underneath the flow of crystal water, I bring my head down to the skin and splash my face hoping it will give me that kick I desperately need and it does, slightly.

It's weird you know, I thought once I was free I would been so happy and I am but it's like I'm free but my mind isn't.

Grabbing a hold of Luca's shirt, I pull the oversized material over my head. Letting the garment slip from my fingers on to the marble floors. I trudge into the shower, manipulating the temperature of the water to a warmer degree.