Hiraeth (Maxian)

❝Spinning❞

Several minutes later, the doctor returned and once again sat beside Ian. He began, "It is clear to me and to your psychiatrist that it is quite a poor decision to let you go home and leave you to your own devices," Ian sighed, he was right. The doctor continued, "so, Max and I have come to the conclusion that, if you're willing of course, Max will come to your house once a day and just monitor you and be there to talk, should you need it. Of course we will work out the specifics later, but it's crucial that you understand this is your choice." Ian's immediate reaction was to say no, no questions asked, but as he opened his mouth, max's head popped into the doorway, just enough so Ian could see the soft features of his face, his eyes meeting Ian's, making him unsure of his decision.

"I'll give you some time to think," the doctor spoke softly. He then left the room again, but before it had time to yet again fill with spiraling loneliness, Max entered. His voice was full of warmth but seem to lack the joy it usually possessed, "it's either this or back to the psychiatric hospital, I don't think that's what you want." Ian looked down, frowning. None of his options were good. However, he did assume being at home was somewhat better than a mental hospital.
"Fine," Ian muttered. He didn't want to look up at Max, but the enormous grin plastered on his face was known to Ian without looking. "I want to go home."

~~~
Ian returned to his his small apartment later that day, it was just how he remembered it, but slightly darker and colder from his failure to pay his bills from the weeks prior.  He felt a cool draft nip at his fingers, he paced upstairs to see the open window with swollen wood beneath it, the rain from the weeks prior had come in through the window and rotted the floor beneath its open panes. In his previous incapacitated state, Ian hardly stopped to notice how utterly unkempt his apartment had become. The floor was barely visible beneath the layers of clothes and trash strewn across the worn panels of floorboards. Ian was overwhelmed, all the responsibilities and memories of his normal life were rushing back to him like someone had opened the floodgates of reality. Ian was spinning, and Max wasn't there to stop it.