a sweet romance

The beginning

Ever since I was young, I knew I was different from my friends.

Often they would talk about who they thought was the cutest girl in the class and when they asked me I always said

"I don't think they are cute at all".

Most of my friends thought I was joking around and that I did like someone in the class but I didn't want to tell them.

I was still young I didn't know what it ment to be gay or straight or just boys liking boys. I thought it was normal after all I like my friends, is there a lot of definitions of like?

I decided to ask my brother who's older than me by 4 years, he was always supportive of me and whatever I do and try to protect me.

However when I told him I didn't find girls attractive but actually I prefer guys he was really shocked he was surprised and quickly with a worried face tells me that

"M-maybe it's just because there's aren't aren't by girls that are your type right now after all your still very small.. I think, no I Know that you will find a girl more attractive when you grow up okay, so don't say such things to anyone anymore Leo promise me you won't."

It was like I wasn't allowed to like guys and as I grew up I soon knew the reason why,

there was a gay guy in my school and he confessed to another guy and that went really wrong. He started getting bullied and getting called gay and ugly and disgusting. He decided to move away and nobody ever saw or talked about him ever again.

I was so scared and ever since I wouldn't talk to anyone about my thoughts. Don't get me wrong I wasn't a loner, I was more on the popular side however I never talked about girls or my sexuality, my thoughts in general ever again.