When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand chocolate.
---
Guy 1: I wasn't that drunk.
Guy 2: Ya you were, you picked up a little Spanish girl and yelled "DORA GIVE ME YOUR MAP, I NEED TO FIND OUT HOW TO GET HOME!"
Guy 1: ................
---
Getting in an argument with someone younger than you. ME: B****! I am older than you. Bring it on!!!
---
When I'm bored I send a text to someone random saying: "I'm done hiding the body"
---
Some people just need a high five.....in the face.....with a chair.
---
Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues.
---
After Tuesday, even the calender goes WTF
---
Thanks to Facebook I now know what everyones bathroom looks like.
---
It's funny how when I'm loud, people tell me to be quite, but when I'm quite people ask me what's wrong with me?
---
The only reason I'm fat is because a tiny body couldn't store all this personality.
----------
THANX FOR READING!!!!!! But wait! There's more.......
YOU ARE READING
The Ultimate LOL Book
HumorCAUTION!!! This book contains material that may lead to laughing, solid abs, and vomiting. Read with caution.
