It was snowing, and whenever it snowed where I live, it snowed hard.
The air outside was frigid, and the flakes flying about in the cold winter air created a wonderful mosaic against the night's black sky. I watched this through the window, hypnotized by the whipping motion of the snowflakes as they danced around each other and fell down, sideways, sometimes up if the wind allowed for it. The sound of the wind against the house howled, sometimes loud and present, sometimes merely a whisper, but at all times it drowned out all the other noise from the outside world. I was still freezing from being outside. Snowflakes still dotted my coat, but I was quickly warming up and the snow was quickly melting under November's touch.
I sat there in my boyfriends arms, wrapped up with a cup of hot chocolate he had made me, a warm blanket he had found for me, and most importantly, November's own body, strong and present and warm against my own. It was New Year's eve, and it made sense to me that on the coldest of days I would feel warmer than I had ever felt. It made sense to me that on the last day of the year I would feel happier than I had ever felt before then.
Me and November were silent, content to simply sit in each other's embrace and just be together. I thought about this past year. All the people I had met. All the people I had only heard about, but they felt just as real to me as November did right now. All the people I had gotten to know so much better than I had before. I thought about all of them by name. January. February. March. April. May. June. July. August. September. October. November. Especially November, my boyfriend, and my best friend.
I hoped they all were happy, but I knew that wasn't the case. But I also knew that the clock was about to strike midnight, and a whole new year would open up to all of them. More time given to them to heal. Another chance for everyone to find that something. That someone. That someone who would take the opportunity to help them heal. That someone they felt like they need so badly that they believed, if they had them, it would solve all their other problems. That thing they think, that once they got it, it won't really solve anything, but they are still without that thing feeling like there's something missing and their stuck with that for what seems like forever.
But now I knew that someone could, in fact, change everything.
But now I knew that it wasn't forever.
Things change. Everything changes. Time has the miraculous power to heal, but so did I. So did everyone I know. They all had helped me, in some way at some time this year, to heal. I had helped all them, in some way, to heal.
"What are you thinking about?" November asked. His voice made me jump a little. I was so used to the silent noise of the howling wind and falling snow.
"How the world works." I replied, then took a moment of silence before I continued. "How time keeps ticking forward. How everything changed this year. How happy and sad and hopeless and hopeful we all were. How we are about to go through all that again."
November leaned closer to me, and said in a low, beautiful voice. "But this time you'll have me."
I smiled at that. I looked back at him into his ocean blue eyes and replied. "And you will have me."
Another moment passed, us smiling into each other's eyes, and November spoke again. To me and only to me. "I love you December"
He leaned down and kissed me. The clock struck midnight, and a New Year began.
