Hard On Me

Chapter One

Chapter One

December 2, 1989, was the worst day of my life. On that day I received the news that my beautiful mother Geneva Love had just passed away and I was only three years old then. My whole world came crashing down and the worst part is, is that her memory fades with each passing day. The last thing she left me with was her heart pendant necklace that opens up to reveal a picture of my mother and I on my second birthday. She was planning to give it me on my thirteenth birthday, sadly she never got the chance. Up until my mother died I lived with her and barely knew my father, then when my mother died my father decided to take me in since he was absent from my life for 3 years. Ever since then I've been living with him since. Then a few years later on May 22, my own father raped me and I was only seventeen at the time and proudly a virgin. That day was even worst because I'll never forget what happened.

I came home that day form the corner store exasperated and ready to take my mid-evening nap on the living room couch when I heard footsteps behind me. Long and behold it was my dad, who at the time had been excessively drinking and smoking weed. He would drop by whenever he felt like coming to the house. Most often he would leave me alone for days even weeks on end. I started to grow resentment towards him and dislike him a lot. My father's name is Donnell but I always think of him as pot head. Anyway he decided to sit by me on the couch, close by me and put his hand next to me.

"Excuse me? " I ask annoyed .

"Yeah, excuse you" My dad said, all at once igniting my temper.

"Can you move your hand and why are you sitting next to me? Shouldn't you go back to getting high, that's all you ever do." Pot head.

"Aww that's not nice." He said with a deceiving grin, "What's with the attitude, I'm not even doing anything, I just wanna sit by my little girl." He said with a devilish grin on his face.

Fully irritated and annoyed, I sighed in frustration and got up and headed towards my room which was down the hallway right across from my mom's old bedroom, which he then took over.

"Wait! " I heard him call behind me, I completely ignored his plea and went to slam my bedroom door in his face when suddenly he put his foot in the way of the door.

"Nobody slams a door in my face " He said threateningly. Instead, he violently pushed the door towards me, so I pushed the door back towards him. If he wanted play this game with my door then I will but he was way to strong for me. He violently shove the door toward me and I fell backwards and my backside landed hard against the floor. He walked into my room and closed the door behind him then locked it,while smiling wickedly the whole time.

A strong premonition slowly started to rise in my chest.

I immediately knew something was up.

"Here let me help you." He reached for my hands but I smacked his hands away.

I got up and stood to my feet, "Get out of my room." I raised my voice.

"Shout all you want, ani't nobody gonna hear you." Then he moved closer and closer to me closing off all the space between us. Then he asked, "Wanna do something really crazy?" Then in one swift move he grab me by my shoulders and pushed me back onto my bed and got on top of me, he was so fast I didn't have time to react.

"Get off of me" I tried to push and kick but it was all useless. He didn't move or even budge."

Your not going anywhere baby girl." Then he pushed his body more on me putting more pressure to the front of my body. God please help me! I thought frantically.

"If you stop trying to resist this won't be so hard." He said.

"What do you mean? What the are you going to do!? " I yelled in complete fear.

He didn't answer my question he just did the unthinkable. He unzipped the zipper of my jeans and aggressively rip them off my legs until I was in nothing but my underwear. He then traced his fore finger on the outside of my underwear.

"No! Get your dirty hands off of me! " I screamed with all my might thinking that someone, at least someone would hear me. But no, nobody knew what was going on except for three people, God, Donnell, and me.

"Too late'' He said. He yanked my underwear down until it slid to my ankles. I tried to close my legs together in a desperate attempt to hide the most precious part of my body but he sat harder down on legs applying more of his weight on me so that I couldn't move. Tears started to fill my eyes when he started to touch me down there.

"What your not liking this? " He laughed. GOD PLEASE HELP ME! Then he got off me briefly to shed his pants, which he was wearing no underwear underneath. The first time that I ever saw a naked human being. Then he got back on top of me and opened my legs. I tried my hardest to keep them clamp shut but he was so strong and forcibly opened my legs and then pushed down on them with his knees. My hips started to hurt. Then he proceeded to violently rape me. This went on for about 6 minutes until Donnell and I could hear someone enter the apartment. Surprised at the person coming in, I took the opportunity and punched him face, which thank God was hard enough for him to get off and out of me. He quickly put his pants on while I found my pants and tried to shield my nakedness. I quickly ran to the door, but he yanked me hard by my hand to pull me back.

"Don't say nothing you hear me!." With tears in my eyes and my limit well reached , I gathered all my strength and I pushed him so hard that his body went to my bed. I ran out my bedroom to face the person who just walked in hoping that they would save me. Donnell came running out after me.

I paused to look to see who it was and unfortunately it was Donnell's girlfriend who I knew wasn't going to help me at all. So there I stood defenseless and helpless while trying to shield my butt nakedness. I went back to my room and cried for the rest of the night wishing that I could be with my mom again. That same night I tried to commit suicide but my attempt failed when I woke up the next day. From that moment on my life would be hard on me.