Lucky Girl (Vmin X Reader)

I - Take me to the sky...

This is it. You finally did it. No, RinJa finally did it.
Your group, after 3 long trainee years with BigHit, finally debuted. You'd been waiting for this day ever since you knew the pain of a trainee - the endless practice, diets, surgery, tears... You always prayed that someday it would be over and now you can finally feel that freedom. You and your groupmates Sohee, Minhee, Hyemi and Hyojin could finally be recognised by someone other than each other!
Still high on adrenaline from your debut stage, you couldn't sleep and instead decided to go on Twitter and check out your group's hashtag - #RinJammin'. Because, not to sound like a narcissistic twat, but you really wanted some anonymous twitter user to call you amazingly talented or beautiful. So you took the plunge and even though Bang PD, your choreographer and even some random dude in the corridor who was waaaaaay too handsome to be a trainee told you over and over again to "never look at fan accounts on Twitter until you're famous enough to defend yourself because they will talk shit about you" you still did it anyway. Because screw the system.

"Omg SOHEE!!! So pretty saranghae unni!!!!!!!! <3"  - @ARMY4LIFEU2005

"Hyemi can choke me with her honey thighs oOF keep spitting them sick bars ily💗💗💗💗" - @rapline.child69

"I heard on knetz that Minhee does her own makeup is it true????? Omg she's so talented!!!" - @lgbts💟

"@lgbts💟 Too bad she's fat tho hahaha" - @RinJa-are-ripoffs!

"@RinJa-are-ripoffs! BITCH DONT TALK ABOUT MY BABY THAT WAY ILL LYNCH U ASSHOLE!!" - @lgbts💟

"Uh... Should y/n really be main vocal? She isn't anything special." - @2NEPINKot4

"@2NEPINKot4 yeah I agree she's so talentless lol, BigHit should have purged her before debut. She can't dance, act or sing and the other members are clearly uncomfortable around her. Four is a more stable number for girl groups anyway." - @HYOJINplsmarryme

"@HYOJINplsmarryme Exactly, she's just not worth putting in such a cool girl group like RinJa. And four is a good number to debut with too, especially in a company like BigHit. I mean, did you hear about what happened with GLAM back in 2014? Shady shit if you ask me..." - @2NEPINKot4

You didn't notice your eyes glazing over with tears until you read the last sentence and your vision began to blur. "Of course," you thought bitterly, "how could I be such a fool? This is exactly why they don't tell us to check social media...I'm such...an idiot..." You trailed off until you cried silently onto your bedroom floor, trying not to wake Hyemi, who was sleeping soundly across the room. You knew you weren't the best actress or dancer but your singing skills is precisely why you auditioned for BigHit in the first place!
"Wow, bang PD must have been deaf to accept such a failure like me into his agency" you thought to yourself, shutting down your laptop, burying your head into your palms and moving slightly to curl up into a ball to cry some more. But then, you had a thought. A small light in the dark cloud that was your self-deprecation fuelled by netizens.
What if you just went and practiced in the studio downstairs?
You knew it was already 1am and you had vocal lessons at 8am tomorrow but you really needed these few extra hours of practice. You needed to be perfect. Yes... perfect. You jumped out of bed, changed out of your pajamas, quickly slipped on a pair of heels and headed across the street to the studio. After the 5 minute walk to get over there, you worried that maybe other trainees were using the studio as 'it's for everyone, from trainees to even the most popular idols.' Somehow, it makes it more likely for trainees to be at the studio extremely late at night, you knew because you were in that position and so was everyone, especially the dance line. But nevertheless, you walked into the building, set your bag down and set up the AUX cord with your phone. As the music began to play and you began dancing, you felt free...yet constricted somehow. You were free to move as you liked but only within the boundaries of choreography set by your teacher. You watched yourself intently in the mirror. Every twist or turn or flourish of any kind was under your own careful eye. Everything had to be exactly as it should be. "That's just how it is in this industry" you thought while dancing. "Every day is a repetition of ctrl+c, ctrl+z." And whenever you did something even remotely wrong, you felt so angry with yourself... Because it wasn't perfect. It would never be perfect.
You would never be perfect so you may as well give up trying to be.
Frustrated with your mind, you decided to have some fun instead. So you turned off your debut single and turned on one of your favourite songs of all time instead - I Am The Best by 2NE1. Hell, you knew the choreography and you even knew all the lyrics too, including CL's raps! (Even though you really wouldn't call yourself a rapper.) So you danced and immediately it took you back to before your trainee days. You would sing and dance to this song and many others like it with your friends, and they would all joke about how they're secretly YG trainees. If you thought about it hard Enough, you could even hear their voices arguing and laughing inside your head. You grinned widely while dancing, rapping and singing until the final "oh my god!" And the song was suddenly over. You landed back on earth with an emotional thud, away from the smiles and good memories of your old friends.
And then suddenly, as if on cue, everything went dark and hazy. Your ankles gave in and your knees buckled. Finally, the rest of your tired body hit the floor. And you don't remember what happened between that moment and the morning after.