smile // kaemaki [not going to continue]

3

After the day of the trial, everything was a blur. I can only vaguely remember the events of that morning. A few people asking me if I was okay, someone asking 'why I was wearing that emo hat', but nothing notable -or worth remembering, really- went on. As if on autopilot, I walked through the barely familiar hallways of the Ultimate Academy. It was calling me. As I opened the door, a relaxing lavender scent greeted me.

I stepped in, leaving all my pain at the door. In here, I could clear my mind. My Ultimate Lab. Monokuma had explained the labs to all of us not long after we found ourselves here. It was nice, to at least feel some means of comfort, especially in this situation. But a part to me cautioned not to feel too at ease. The killing game had begun, after all, and Monokuma made this room - how trustworthy could it be?

Brushing off the thoughts, I made my way to the sleek, black piano. This lab really is fitted to our personal preferences, I thought, scanning the room as I sat down on the piano bench. It was almost creepy. Flipping through the numerous scores lined up on a nearby shelf, one in particular seemed to call out to me - Clair de Lune by Debussy.

Involuntarily, I feel a smile spread on my lips. This song meant quite a lot to me, and it gave me a pleasant nostalgic feeling. I placed the sheet on the stand in front of me, and began to play. Having a release, a way to escape... was really what I needed right now. As I played, I reflected on how life has been the past few days.

Waking up here was probably the scariest and most confusing scenario I could've imagined at the time, not to mention being forced to participate in a killing game, of all things. After spending a while here, and making friends with everyone that I could, I was suddenly jolted out of this fantasy and yanked into a harsh reality the second I saw the first body -Rantaro's body- on the ground in the library.

Not long after, the class trial followed. It was clear everyone was on edge. The idea that one of us here was a murderer, had killed someone- it just didn't feel real. Worse, when Shuichi was the one found guilty. He only wanted to stop the game, to save all of us-

My thoughts and my playing were interrupted by a single tear falling onto my hands. Followed by another, and another. Before long, the room was filled with my soft sobs.

I barely managed to hear a soft knocking noise on the door of the lab. Wiping the tears from my eyes and stifling my sniffles, I took a deep breath, walked over to the door, and opened it.

The face that greeted me was Maki Harukawa, the Super High School Level Child Caregiver.

We met early on, as did everyone else when we found ourselves here with no explanation. I tried to connect with her as I did with everyone else here, but she just seemed so... prickly, and stoic. It was hard to talk to her, not to mention get her to talk at all, so as a result we didn't interact much with anyone. I really wanted to befriend everyone, but it was her who just wouldn't crack. Out of everyone, she's the last person I'd expect to be here right now.

"Oh... hi, Maki." I said, rather awkwardly, greeting the unexpected face.

"Hey." She angled her head off to the side, as though looking at something that wasn't there. "Is it alright if I come in?

"Yeah, of course," I say, closing the door behind her and walking back to my piano bench. "So, um..."

"Why am I here?" Maki spoke up suddenly, finishing my hesitated question. "I'm sure that's what you mean to ask me." Maki continued, still avoiding eye contact. I figured that was just her thing, and she probably doesn't do it for any specific reason. She seems like a pretty closed off person in general. I honestly expected her to be more... lively for a child caregiver, but I guess that's just her personality.

"Um, yeah, I guess so." It is what I wanted to ask, but after thinking twice, asking her why she's here might be rude. It was never easy to tell what she was thinking, or how she would take things.

"I just wanted to talk for a little."

"...Talk?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I was passing by this hallway and heard you crying. I figured I couldn't really leave you alone like that."

"Ah, sorry about that." I probably should've got a hold on myself, rather than crying as I did.

"I..." Maki looked down, and started fiddling with one of her twin-tails. "I know how you feel. How it feels, that is- to lose someone close to you."

I look at her, silently urging her to continue. She never talked about her past, or much about herself for that matter.

"When I was younger, I had a really close friend. She and I did everything together growing up." Maki continues. Watching and listening to her talk, I notice that she's being careful. Careful not to reveal too much? Maki really is more than meets the eye. She's a mystery, and clearly wants to keep it that way.

"I cared really deeply for her." Maki pauses in contemplation.

"What... happened...?" I ask. I instantly regret asking such an ignorant question. Obviously, she wouldn't be bringing her up if she were alive, I reprimand myself in my thoughts. Unexpectedly, Maki looks up at me. It's the first time we've made true eye contact. Her ruby-red eyes almost seemed to glow in the slightly yellow lighting of the room. They seemed to ensnare me, and I couldn't look away. My breath hitches in my throat for a moment.

She seemed to notice my immediate recoil after asking, and as though reading my thoughts, replies with an "It's okay."

She looks back down at her hands, breaking our short-lived eye contact, and proceeded.

"Unfortunately, she died. She died in a car accident, saving a child."

"Ah... I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'd like to think that she died happily, knowing she was at least able to give her life to protect someone else's." Shuichi... I think, being reminded of him risking- and eventually giving up -his life to give us a chance to escape from here. Thinking back on the moment, I see a clear vision of his face in my head, like a rewinding film reel. He looked so scared...

"Yeah... she must've been scared though," I added, seeing his eyes flash in my mind once again. "Knowing that you might not come out of something alive..."

"Yeah." Maki seemed to have a strange look on her face, almost as though she knew how that felt first-hand. No, it couldn't be. I reassure myself as Maki carried on.

"You know, Shuichi wanted to save all of us. He entrusted you with that hope." Her eyes flick up briefly at Shuichi's cap on my head.

"I know. I'll try my best to honour his wish, and get us all out of here." I assure her, unsure of where that confidence-filled line came from. After saying that, I could've sworn that I saw an inkling of a smile on Maki's face from the corner of my eye. I notice myself imagining how beautiful her smile would be before she speaks up again.

"Well, I guess I should leave you alone. You probably need time to think. Quite a lot has happened."

Not exactly knowing what to say, I nod awkwardly as Maki leaves.

I should thank her later. She really helped me out. Afterwards, I stayed in my lab and thought a bit about ways to get us all out of here, for Shuichi's sake.

As I sat in the lab to think, I also made a pact with myself.

One day, I'm going to get Maki Harukawa to smile.

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