It hurt seeing you move on without me, It hurt to see you live your life without ever knowing that I was supposed to be the missing peice to your near finished puzzle.
BB never thought her life could get worse until the link that kept everything tog...
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Its hurt me to my core, its broken every feeling of my happiness; and every feeling of optimism that I had. She's left me alone to deal with the hurt of her past which is now my present. She was my mother, once my best friend, my hero, savior even. I got to spend a measly 16 years with her until the running, the fighting, and the sacrifices, became too much and she took her life. Leaving me running from something I didn't know we needed to be running from...Life.
As I sit in V's basement; tracing the razor marks riddled on my arm with my pinky; I knew that it was time for me to stop running. It was truly getting old; the life my mother lived was supposed to be made with a gold exterior but it wasn't one that I had. My body could only take so much and unlike my mama, I knew I wouldn't.
I decided then and there that I was gonna find the other part to this equation of that made me; parent number 2. Someone that my mom has only spoken about 3 times since I've been born, who doesn't even know I exist, or maybe doesn't feel the need to care. I refuse to go bad out without finding him.
