My trials with sexuality

Conversations

Person: if you're pan, does that mean you're sexually attracted to pots and pans

Me: no it means I like al-

Person: or maybe it's fire hydrants

Me: how-what-no

Person: MELONSAI IS ATTRACTED TO FIRE HYDRANTS

Me: I LIKE ALL GENDERS AND SEXUALITIES DUMBASS
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Person: so if you can like anyone, doesn't that mean you're not LGBT

Me: no, why?

Person: because you could also like a boy, making you straight

Me: but the majority of my preferences aren't straight. so no, I am not straight
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Me: it's pride month, the gay agenda is in full affect

Friend 1: what should we do for pride month

Me: flannel??

Friend 2: we already wear that everyday

Me: maybe we can draw our flags and tape them to our clothing
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Me: walks into restroom

Classmates: happy pride month

Me: aww thanks
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Me: so you do know your boyfriend is a homophobe right

Friend 3: yeah...I wanted to break up with him, I just needed a reason

Person: I hear y'all talking about homophobia, could you guys stop it's an actual issue

Me: I'm pansexual, I know very well that it's an issue

Person: you're pan! That's so beautiful!!

Me: -achivement unlocked: new friend-