Car Drive

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You were crying and having a breakdown, your day was just the worst and you hated everything. You couldn't hold back any of these tears anymore and so you just let them fall and float down your face. You called your boyfriend so he could pick you up, you didn't know if you would make it home walking. When he arrived you were relieved that you don't have to stand around anymore with people looking at you weirdly because of your pain written all over your face.  As you got into the passenger seat he looked at you concerned and asking but you shaked your head no, just sat beside him. He drove around for a while, god knows where he wanted to go, you kept on crying. He gave you his phone, so you could turn on the music and pick a song or playlist you want to hear. He knew what kind of impact music had on you. It calmed you down and spoke right out of your soul. Music was where you escaped to when things get too heavy. He related to that so you both had that in common and loved that the other one appreciated and understood it the same way. After some songs you calmed down and stopped crying, but you still didn't feel like talking so you just watched the scenerie outside. He knew if you'd wanted to talk about it, you'd start and he didn't want t rush you, even though he really was concerned about you a lot. Anyways he didn't began to ask you, that way you didn't feel interrogated, which everyone else had always done and you hated. He started humming to one of the favourite songs you both shared. You looked at him and smiled, admiring his features and his voice, it never failed to sooth you and you loved it, you started to hum with him, since you felt more confident in your voice now, meaning you were sure now your voice wouldn't suddenly break or something. You both hummed to the song and after it, you both smiled. After that you lowered the volume of the music and started to talk. Talk about all the comments everyone made, the pressure from that, your insecurities and fears. You talked about how everything just is too much and how you think that you can't take it anymore and just are done with everything and everyone. You just wanted the pressure to stop and the problems to finally disappear so you could live in peace again. But you knew exactly that it was impossible, that you had to face these difficulties, but wear afraid and didn't know how. You felt helpless and because you had that breakdown you also felt weak. He stayed silent all the time over and listened to your deep feelings within you. He didn't judge or interrupt or looked at you weirdly. He just listened. You were aware of the fact that he wouldn't be able to make your problems disappear, but you had him hearing you completely out, without fearing it would go around. You knew you could rely on him. He always supported you and that is what he said. "I will support you forever, y/n. No matter what, I will have your back". He said that many times already, but this time it had so much more meaning for you. Because you felt his support, you felt his sincerety and his seriousness. He knew that he couldn't find answers or solutions and he knew you knew too, so he didn't need to force himself for any kind of solution. He knew you coud make it and did his best to support you in any kind of way possible. Sure, he gave you advice, but he didn't say things like "you have to do this and that", he rather said "this would be another way or that could be possible too". He would research and tell you all your possible ways and encouraged you for every way. "I don't care how you do it, I know you will do it"

After talking about all this you felt less burdened, not released, but definitely not as weak as before. "You are nothing like weak", he said, "you are the strongest person I know". Things like this made you unbelievable happy and you just couldn't help but put the worries aside. You both didn't talk after this conversation and headed home. You made a stop at Domino's and ordered pizza and decided to watch a movie and cuddle at home. You loved evenings like this, your favourite food, your favourite activity and to top it all, your favourite human being.

Falling asleep during the movie kind of became a habit to you, so you drifted off in his embrace, enjoying the warmth and his scent. You smiled in your sleep and he looked down at you, admiring your features. Tracing your face with his fingertips softly he whispered "I love you y/n" and went to sleep too.

***

Word count: 844 words

So yeah, this was something I thought of when I had...well that kind of mood. I experienced a breakdown and I think it was the worst thing I had to go through. So if anyone reading this, has things they can't talk about, please message me, I know how you're feeling, maybe someone anonymus can help or you just need someone to listen to you. I'm gladly there for anyone needing me and I'm already sorry if I can't help changing, but at least I'm a great listener. You are not alone ❤️

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