Chapter Two – Year 2011
“I can’t do it Leo. I just can’t.” I stand there looking at the phone and holding a tissue in my right hand, shifting my weight nervously. Leo stands next to me, giving me a hard look.
“Yes you can Emily. What’s the worst that can happen?” His look is softening along with his tone, but I’m not fooled, he’s even more determined now then he was ten minutes ago. Maybe because he managed to get me out of bed and into the living room.
I give him an incredulous look. “What’s the worst that could happen? Really Leo?”
“Look, I know you don’t like her and she’s wasn’t a good person, but your mother asked you to. You don’t have to say yes, you just have to call her.” Damn it Leo. I can feel myself start to crack. It’s just a phone call; she won’t be able to see your terrified expression, I think to myself.
“F…. fine! Damn you Leo!” I shove him and his smug expression out of the way, grab the phone and start to dial the number.
“Wait! I already dialed it.” I give him my WTF face, and he flinches. “I had a sneaking suspicion?” He says uncertainly.
“Shut it before I shut you. You know I’m not having a good week, I don’t need you assuming I’m doing something and then doing it for me, let me feel a sense of self power, would you?” The words sound harsh, but he knows I’m kidding, thanks to the little smile spreading across my face.
I hit the talk button on the phone and wait in shivering anticipation of absolute terror - I was anticipating absolute terror but after hearing that smooth, innocent voice on the other end, I cracked-
“Hello?”
“Sarah…” I’m almost speechless with some emotion I can’t quite verify.
“And this is…?” I snap myself out of it.
“Oh, right, sorry! This is Emily, from high school… do you remember me?” In my mind I’m planning on telling her I’m sick and can’t hang out anytime soon, but…
“Oh my God! Oh my God! Emily, of course I remember you! I’m really excited to talk, but… I’m a little busy right now. Can we talk later? How about that old coffee shop off of France and Old Shakopee? Great! 4 o’clock sound good? Great, see you there!”
And before I know it I’m left floundering with my mouth open.
“Um… Emily? You’re kind of scaring me a little bit… do you mind explaining what just happened?” Leo puts a hand on my shoulder. I manage to close my mouth and turn my head towards him.
“Turns out I’m meeting Sarah Burlich, for the sixth time.” He just turns his head and gives me a funny look.
“There’s more isn’t there?” Oh, Leo, you know me so well.
“Yeah actually, that’s not the worst part.” Leo starts to look alarmed, as he well should be! “She called Caribou ‘that old coffee shop’!”
Leo just laughs and kisses me, saying mockingly; “She didn’t! Oh the horror!”
Flash Back >>> Age of 13, Year 1998
"Sarah! Why would you do that to him?" I’m so angry; I can't believe she would do that, what does she have against him?
"I don't know, for fun?" She laughs, and so do I, even though I want to punch her. That’s Sarah; abuse is so funny with her. She can bite you, and you will want to scream and punch her, but all you can do is laugh, because she's laughing.
"I... I have something to tell you." She looks down at her feet and doesn't look me in the eye. She grabs my arm and pulls me down a side hallway. She casts a glance at a few straggling students passing by us.
"What is it? Why the secrecy? Are you pregnant?" My eyes bulge out and I look at her stomach. It doesn't LOOK like she's pregnant...
"OW! Sarah, what the hell?" I hold my hand to the side of my face where she just slapped me.
"My eyes - " She lifts my chin up so I'm looking at her eyes " - are up here. Does my stomach have eyes? That's what I thought."
"Okay, then what is it." I shake off the slap. It’s just how Sarah works. She rolls up her relatively short sleeves and moves her upper-arm into the light. Something catches my attention, and I peer closer. There are shiny little strands running up and down, and left and right on her arm.
"Sarah... You cut?" She nods. "Since when?"
"A few weeks ago, I'm sorry Em. It started as a shaving accident. It felt good, and I like blood." She looks like she's about to cry. Though I'm sure what she just said is true in her mind, I can't help but think it's because of things at home.
Sarah won't admit it ever, but she's going through some things at home. Her mom smokes weed and pot, and got arrested a month ago and Sarah doesn't know when she'll see her again.
On her birthday, she got a letter from jail. Her mom had written her a letter, apologizing and saying she loved her, and a bunch of other things. Sarah brought it to school and when she turned away, I snatched it up and read it. Then I handed it back to her and gave her a hug, both of us started to cry.
"Are you mad?" Sarah asks. I wonder why she even asks, it won't make a difference, I know. I shake my head and pull her into a hug.
"Of course not. I just wish it could have been a pregnancy." She pulls back, shocked.
"Because then I wouldn't have to make the decision of whether or not I want to slap you. If you were pregnant and I hit you, I could get in big trouble." I pause, then growl at her, "But you’re not pregnant, so I suggest you start running."
With that Sarah's eyes get wide and she turns and runs as fast as she can, because she knows I will. That has always surprised me. If I ever hit her, she could hit me back harder; make me regret it. But if I even hint that I’m going to hit her, she's terrified.
I laugh to myself and shift my stuff, the bell rings and I swear under my breath as I book it to Science class.
