Love in Serengeti

The flash back

Baby I miss you.. living without you is like living in the desert,I can no longer work ,sleep or hang out, because every time I think of doing anything I only remember you, Just know baby I have been fired from my job.

l spend all day getting drunk, I no longer have any direction in life. How can I plan the future while you are the future.

It's impossible for me to move on without seeing your cute face or that voice of yours which gave me courage to move on every time, I fell down.My bed is cold because you well the heater , My life is empty because you were the content.

Sometimes i blame my self for loosing you, I  wonder  if the love i showed you was enough or  the care I gave you was enough???

I only  realize that if love was the cause. I remember loving you more than  my self  ,sometimes  I blame my self for loosing  Papa John cause I cared more  about  you than  him.

"Lord my you rest his soul, Papa I miss you,  You gave me all your love and raised me to be a good man. I remember you always told  me " We are free to make a choice , but  we are not free from the consequences of our choices" .

Those are the words which I will always remember  cause those were your last words Papa . I hope one day we will meet again in heaven  and I will get to hug you tight Papa.. 

Has I  finished writing those last words on my diary , tears we're  flashing all over my face, I just couldn't stop crying . Remembering  all the memories.  saying to my self it was worth the pain.

I stood up  from my favorite chair and went straight up  to the window . Looking at  the wonderful view of  Dar es salaam  city ,  It's  a busy morning and all the streets are parked with people going to there daily their activities.

Every morning  since the break up and loosing Papa John . Before anything I waked up  and stared at the window for sometime before going  on with other activities.

I don't know why I liked seating there but it kinda gives me  hope that apart from all that have happened I should keep moving on, looking at the children going to school ,looking at the bankers with their black  suits it made me smile , Something that  I haven't done in along time.