Wrapped || Hemmings

One

14:03 PM - Rehabilitation Center The New Start.

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❝It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want for a wife. However little know…” I begin to read for my 8th time in my staying here the novel pride and prejudice by the classic author Jane Austen. I genuinely don’t notice the presence of Dr. Irwin, my counselor, standing in my door frame while balancing back and forth on his feet. A loud sound that I can’t exactly describe leaves his throat, causing me to look at him.

Even for what looks to be a grown up man, knowing exactly what his job contains, he seems rather nervous than normal. Well, to be honest, nobody in here can you actually accept as normal.

His white sneakers are making the horrifying peeping sound against the floor that makes me feel uncomfortable and annoying. He pulls at the sleeves of his white t-shirt and finally decides to talk.

My eyes are focused on his and noticed how he examined the other empty half of my room. We ‘patients’ normally share a room but since nobody actually wants to stay with me longer than 2 days, I have my room all for myself and that partly calms me down and softens my stay more than I thought it would.

“What are you doing?” I try to remain calm as he walks closer and then I figured out what he was doing.

There was somebody standing behind him and what looks from here, with an ego even bigger than his feet and by the size of his feet, his ego was pretty large. I closed my novel and placed it back on my bookshelf with the other classics.

“Aubrey, let me introduce you to your new roommate” Dr. Irwin smiles and talks slower as usual. His hand runs through his brown curls with a hint of blonde in it, his hazel eyes are sparkling and his dimples showing.

I come closer to my counselor and debate whether or not I would make a rude or just a remark on this situation. I choose to remain silent as the tall guy with blonde hair that was perfectly styled comes into my room, which I now have to share despite my complains.

The tall guy walks up to the empty bed with no sheets and sits down. It’s a bunk bed and I have already claimed the bed above so he just haves to agree with taking whatever is left.

“Make yourself at home.” Dr. Irwin tells the new guy before he leaves the room.

They always say those things to us to comfort us but it doesn’t help. It only makes things worse and while most of my ‘friends’ are leaving, I’m still stuck here and I don’t know why. Probably because you have no control over yourself, my subconscious adds and for some parts I know she is right.

It’s true, I have no control over myself or my doings because of my mental illness but I am alright most of the time. The pills I take are supposed to help me but they make me feel empty and depressed, an even worse feeling than fear. My life before my therapy wasn’t so easy but it wasn’t so difficult either.

My parents dropped me here one night when I was asleep and the next thing I knew is that doctors plastered a name on me and brought me to this room. Nobody gave me an explanation what happened that night and my needs to know aren’t as strong anymore since. For any wondering, the doctors gave me the name Agoraphobia.

I know what it means because I once grabbed a dictionary from the office in the hallway but I never understood why it was a mental disorder or why it convinced my parents to bring me here in the first place.

Agoraphobia: (/ˌægərəˈfoʊbiˌæk/) is an anxiety disorder characterized by anxiety in situations where the sufferer perceives certain environments as dangerous or uncomfortable, often due to the environment's vast openness or crowdedness.