Pain and Comfort

The Pain

The first scar on my mind was watching my dad die from lethal radiation trying to keep the Enclave from taking the Purifier. I can't say I ever got over it. How could I? Second, watching my boyfriend die at the battle to take back the Purifier. He got shot with plasma. In his time of need I couldn't save him. I'm supposed to be a doctor and I couldn't save my boyfriend. I loved him, but I admittedly got over it. On to my travels from DC to the Mojave. I've seen some fucked up shit just on the way there. Gained plenty of scars. When I arrived in the Mojave I took some jobs. Met some good people. Survived a trip to Zion. Beautiful place, but the White Legs were terrifying. The entire time I was there I was wishing I had stayed home. Home with Arcade. But I needed the money. From there I came across this radio signal, guiding me to the Divide. This is where I was broken, mentally. Physically I'm stronger than ever. I at least had ED-E to talk to. He understood me. It was nice to have someone to talk to that I can trust for once. I'm getting there with Arcade, but he trusts me already. Makes me anxious. Why would he trust me? ...I love him to death. I would give my life for him. Not that it would mean much, I'm worthless and broken. But to me, he's my world. My rock. I feel a connection. He probably doesn't feel it. Would be just my luck.

Shit, so I killed Ulysess. He already started the launch of his missiles. I need to stop it. Maybe do some good in my shitty life before I die. I may be fucked up but at least I have a sense of right and wrong. I can't take down the encryption to stop the launch, so I re-rout them to hit Legion territory. I didn't want to hit the NCR. Not because I support them or anything, but because most of them are good people. It's their government. Anyway, after the missiles launched I took ED-E and ran for it. The Marked Men and Tunnlers parted and stayed out of my way. I don't care why, I was just glad to have a break. A break from things shooting, swinging, and slashing at me. I almost felt I had some worth. Almost. Then I made it back to the Mojave and unconsciously hiked to Freeside. To the Mormon Fort. To Arcade, my love. When dark came and I wasn't there, when I was tired, I pitched a crude tent and collapsed. I need to hold it in. Just until I get to my Love. It might scare him away, he might not remember me by now. He might hate me for sending those missiles to the Legion. No doubt he saw the explosion. Heard it. Felt the ground shake. My father would be disappointed to see what his little boy has become. Because that in some regards I'm glad he died, only so he couldn't see me like this. I won't fall apart here. Morning came, I was starving, weak from the journey, and dehydrated. Not to mention the stinging sunburn and infected wounds from the Divide. On my upper right arm a bullet grazed me. It's infected. Oozing yellow, thick pus and blood. I tried to clean it best I could but I only made it worse. One on my left leg. It's worse than the arm. Three claw marks from tunnlers. Purple and bruised, almost scabbed over. The pus from this is more a yellow-green color. Blood too, of course. I hope I can save these limbs. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't get around on my own. I march to Freeside and one of the Kings runs up to me to tell be about how the King is proud of how I've been trying to help out when he sees the shape I'm in.
"Oh shit, we need to get you to the Followers. Quick." He says. I'm limping so he helps me walk. Why? I'm not worth it. We get to the Fort and he calls one of the doctors over. From there I'm taken to one of the tents and they cut off some of my clothes to get to the wounds. They examine them. I'm fading out of consciousness as a few more doctors enter the tent. When my vision fades and I look up, I see who I think is Arcade and I hear a faint and worried 'is he going to be okay?' and with that I lose consciousness.