Dearest diary,
So yeah stuff has happened that I should probably write about but I can't. This crap really isn't working out very well and I don't know....
So recently like in the last hour I discovered I am a really stupid person. This has to do with how I deal with emotion. During the summer I'm happy because yeah I don't have to deal with school bitches and assholes...but I always end up feeling bad about this time in summer. I don't know. I guess it's because I'm alone and thinking more and my brain isn't always the best place to be. I'm not saying I'm crazy I'm just saying...I don't know.
I tend to trick myself into believing I'm braver then I am. Then when I get into a situation I get some anxiety. I don't know if I would call it anxiety but I freak out a little and just want to run from the situation.
I also learned that I hold all my feelings up. Then instead of having a bad day I have a bad week or sometimes two weeks. In that week I tend to fight more and take my anger out on someone who doesn't deserve it.
To round all this up. I'm saying I'm not happy with myself right now. I don't like how I'm acting or the character I'm portraying.
I'm getting sick. Well sick feeling. Not an actual sickness just.... I don't know how to say it if you haven't felt this way before. It's just kinda sucky. Well that's all I guess.
~"This is what makes us girls.
We all look for heaven and we put love first"~
-Lana del ray~This is What Makes us Girls
-=Ryleigh_kitten=-
