connor waited anxiously in his room for him to arrive. liam lived just around the corner, so it would only be a couple minutes now. they'd known each other for so long, connor had been in love with liam for as long as he could remember. after all, how was he supposed to resist his quirky, lopsided smile? although most people wouldn't agree, connor loved the brackets that delicately decorated his teeth. he loved all his little mannerisms. the way his head moved wildly when he played guitar, and the way his eyes squinted when he laughed. just.....everything about him was so perfect.
the problem was that, liam wasn't gay.
liam had a girlfriend.
mind you, things weren't going very well between them.
but still, it meant that connor always had to watch from the sidelines as liam ran off with someone else.
currently, it was with marie. marie didn't really quite fit into a category. she had dyed her hair bright orange, and loved pop punk. but at the same time, she was a complete fucking hypebeast. she was so weird. connor thought it was disgusting. connor thought that liam could do much better.
none of it stopped connor from daydreaming, though.
connor tensed as he saw the doorknob to his basement room twist slowly. the two boys were best friends, and while it killed connor, it was the closest that they were ever going to get to dating. it meant that liam would enter his side door without even knocking. connor loved that so much.
time seemed to slow down as the door opened (as it always did,) the few moments before connor could see the boy he loved so much, each feeling like an eternity.
"hey."
connor shifted his eyes towards the doorway.
god, liam was just so beautiful.
tall, with messy blonde hair that really needed to be cut. bright blue eyes, perfect little nose, slight jawline. yeah, it was all there. all he could ever want.
"you there?"
fuck, connor was staring again. liam pulled his hands out of his jean pockets and clasped them together.
"y-yeah... sorry about that, just.....tired..."
liam smirked.
it was like he knew what he did to connor.
liam put his hands back into his pockets and walked over from the doorway to the bed. he giggled, realizing he forgot to take off his shoes. he gave connor a dumb look and threw them to the wall with full force.
then he redirected his attention to the lovestruck boy, his dopey face almost immediately painted over with concern.
"you know you can tell me anything, right? im your b e s t f r i e n d."
he dragged out the last words of his sentence. liam had only been in the room for a minute, and the air was already becoming tense. something was off with him today.
"don't worry about it, not something i can tell you."
"i swear i won't judge!!"
"liam, please drop it. i don't wanna talk about it."
he didn't wanna drop it. he wanted to tell liam all about how much he loved him and how long he has, and how everything he did made his insides turn to dust and float away.
and it must have shown on his face, because liam pulled him into a tight hug, connors face in his chest, liam wrapping his bigger frame around him. connor slowly brought his own hands up to cup liam's waist. this was nice. this was so nice. it was all that connor wanted.
and it was just another thing to love about liam. no matter what, liam always cared. always had, and always would. liam had such a beautiful soul to match with his beautiful body.
"i love you, connor."
not in the way connor wanted him to.
"i love you too, liam."
he went completely limp in the taller boy's arms. he could fall asleep like this. he could stay here forever.
liam moved one of his hands to the top of connor's head, still making a conscious effort to keep an elbow on connor's shoulder. liam ran his fingers through connor's caramel hair, slowly, and delicately.
moments like this would happen all the time when they hung out. but only when they were alone. connor wanted to do this kind of thing around everyone else, too. he wanted to walk around holding liam's hand, kissing his cheek, staying as close to him as possible, so that every stranger passing by would know that the beautiful boy was only his, and no one else's.
"i can tell something's wrong, conno. are you sure you don't wanna talk about it?"
connor wanted to burst. he considered it for a moment. knowing liam, the worst thing that could happen is him politely rejecting him, and connor never leaving his house again out of pure sadness and embarrassment. yeah, maybe not.
he reluctantly pulled himself away from liam's strong grasp, and looked him dead in the eye.
"it's okay, liam. there's nothing you can do about it."
he sighed, looking desperate. god, even when he was sad, he looked like an angel. liam cared about him so much. just, not in the way he wanted him to.
"if you insist."
the tension still hadn't cleared. connor shifted over, and the two sat quietly at either side of the bed.
connor was panicking a little bit. this never happened. liam and him were always able to keep a conversation. maybe he did something wrong?
"i know this might be really weird to say, but,"
liam looked like he wanted to eat his words as soon as he said them.
"what?"
"i dunno, you just like, look really nice today, that's all."
connors heart did a million cartwheels. any time liam complimented him, even on the most meaningless thing, he freaked out.
"thanks!!! uh, you, uh, look beautiful,"
fuck. he was so awkward.
liam just laughed.
he looked at his crossed legs and then flicked his eyes back up towards connor.
"thanks."
connor was desperately trying to revive their normal dynamic.
he caught himself darting his eyes at everything except for liam.
"do you uh, wanna put on a record or something?"
"hell yeah!"
liam's eyes squinted again, as he smiled from ear to ear.
boys will be boys.
perfect motherfuckers.
