Mixed Feelings||KatsuDeku

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Have you ever had that feeling, that feeling inside of you that makes you want to burst? That feeling that flutters in your stomach, makes your heart stop, or messed with the way you think??

Yea, most people do. Most people call that feeling, that gut-wrenching feeling, love. People usually have chances with the people they think they love whether they believe they do or not, but me? I have no chance at all, no hope from my perspective.

I liked a guy in my class named Katsuki Bakugo. Now I know what you're thinking, "that's not bad what are you talking about?"

It is bad though, I'm a guy and to top it off, he hates me to my core. Every last ounce of my existence drives him off the walls. I'm always trying to figure out what I did to upset him so badly, it's so bad that he's my bully now. He mentally and physically abuses me and I could push him away whenever I wanted but, I didn't want to hurt him.

Even though he hurts me, I still love him because there was a time where we were inseparable. A bond that I thought could never break until it did. It was a sunny day in middle school and I ran up to Katsuki from behind as he showed his quirk off to all his friends. I tapped his shoulder and when he turned around I hugged him.

Katsuki ended up shoving me harshly to the ground and I scraped my elbows on the loose rubble of the cement. I stood up, dazed from his shove and looked at him with sad, confused eyes. I could have sworn that day I saw remorse in his eyes but it quickly faded into laughter with his friends.

I only walked home to sit on my bed and think of things I could have done to make him do such a thing to me. At the time, I didn't realize he was just embarrassed so I blamed myself every time he picked on me with his friends. I never understood any of it, to this day I still don't.

Katsuki still treats me like the lowest scumbag alive and it hurts worse and worse, every single time he says it. It chips away at my heart and makes me want to crumble into a million pieces, but I don't. I stand proud, and I stand tall knowing that I can do anything with the right motives and an accomplishing smile.

When Katsuki and I were both excepted into U.A. he slammed me onto a lunch table with a hand wrapped tightly around my throat, threatening to kill me and he had himself taken to the principal's office. He toned down the actions he inflicted on me since rumor had it that he would be kicked out of the schooling system if something like that happened again.

When we entered U.A for the first time and met our home room teacher, Mr. Aizawa I slowly changed up to how I am now.

I had a lot more confidence, I was more toned and built up and I always had a shining smile on my face. I stood more for myself and was bolder in the actions I took knowing that I couldn't be a push over if I wanted to be a hero.