Random Stories

a p r i l

april was my flower

it almost seemed that may had come early and that the world had forgotten to let her bring her showers. she would touch me and i would feel this great burst of electricity. i'm surprised i wasn't destroyed the moment i saw her. her hair was an always tangled mess of red, kinky and curly from her father. her skin was that exact shade of creamy, warm brown of werther's caramel. and her eyes, from her mother, were the single two brightest blue things i'd ever seen.

it was only supposed to be a one time thing. we were at her house and she wanted to play truth or dare. it wasn't sensual, at first. but we were kids, both 14, both curious. it slowly became a game of no dare no clothes. i'd already stupidly backed out of four so i was in my giant shirt and a pair of floral underwear. she was so close to me, i could feel her morning chill on my nose. i dared her to kiss me. and it was wonderful, and taboo, and everything i could've hoped for. she pulled away and i rested my hand on her neck. i realized i was falling for this girl, and nothing would reach out its tendrils to catch me. my mother would me mad, i knew, and my father madder. but it all seemed to just melt.

april had the heat of june in her kiss. it was supposed to be a one time thing. but somehow every time i was over at her house, it turned into the same thing. her hands intertwined in mine, asking for permission. i always said yes, and she always kissed me.

the first time was the best time. i'd always been afraid of losing my virginity. i was scared that it would hurt when he went inside me. but now he was a girl, not just any girl but he was an april. and she asked if it was ok, her lifting up my baggy tee. i said yes, although i had no underclothes on. she kissed me, and it was so slow but it was as if her held back april shower had come all of a sudden and she was coming undone on top of me. and she, inexperienced as me, went inside. i gasped and my legs closed, and she pulled away. i'm sorry. did i hurt you? are you ok? yes I'm fine, i'm just a bit surprised. and so her fingers curled in me again because that's what the internet told her to do.

she saw me kissing a boy once. she didn't know that i was upstream-downstream, that I bent both ways, that i was a double edged blade. she wasn't mad, to my shock. i'm just a bit surprised, and she let us be.

there was april after him. april never stopped, not until college. i remember holding her on the sidewalk, rain pouring down on us and a streetlight like the moon reflecting on our wet skins, we were something out of a cinema. i don't wanna lose you, you won't, when will i see you, april, when, april, WHEN. i don't know and she only cried harder than i was. i gripped her close to me and we stood like tat for an hour. she kissed me and again and again, longer and deeper so her sharp but still no sweater weather was inside of my soul. i remember that feeling. i always do feel it most when april comes around.

april is in my July. it's been seven years and we talk all the time. i miss her cool morning and her taking off my sweater now weather. she sees me, her kinky fire curls and water eyes looking at me but her face isn't. i smile and wave at my favorite mint and she smiles too. hey, hey april, how have you been, good, when are you free, tonight.

it was supposed to be a one night thing, but I missed work in he morning. i had her, her finger petals almost getting crushed in my hands. i never let go of april. i have her every month now. And she finally had her shower, and i my crunching leaves.

because she's april and i'm autumn, and our love is as real as yours.

- My good friend came out to me the other day. Being someone who doesn't consider themselves part of the LGBTQ+ community, I always wonder what it's like. I asked her to tell me about her first one with a girl. Then I asked someone else and someone else and so on. I wanted this to be raw and sappy and stupid lovey-dovey because when I asked the what they wish they saw in the media it was "things like high school musical type romances and shit, but gay." So this is for y'all.