Simple Sweetness

Chapter 25: An Ending

The sharp lighting in the overly white tiled room was hurting her eyes. Raye winced slightly, tucking a stray lock of midnight black hair behind an ear. The glare of the florescent lights didn't hurt as much, as the hole of grief currently boring relentlessly into her heart. She couldn't stop the tears that were creeping out the corners of her eyes. Swiping in frustration at the continued moisture, only to have more replace the ones she had brushed away.

"Raye...please don't cry. It's doesn't hurt anymore. I'm just cold, so cold." Mina's whispered up at Raye. Mina turned her head sluggishly, seeking her lovers face. Her once vibrant blue eyes were faded, barely opened. Hooded and dull, as if her gaze was sightless. Already facing that dark void of death, that Raye had been dreading.

"I'm afraid." Mina croaked, trying to laugh it off. But her voice was weak, hoarse and cracking, barely creating sound.

It was more then Raye could bear. Her admission of fear was breaking her in so many more unspeakable ways. Taking a quivering breath, she gathered Mina gently from the tile and into her arms. Lifting her carefully into her lap. She leaned down and pressed her lips to her forehead. Tears slipping unchecked down her cheeks. She had no idea how to go on with her gone.

"I'm here, Mina. I will not leave you so don't be afraid." Raye promised, as Mina smiled weakly up at her. Closing her eyes as if the few words she had spoken had drained the last of her reserves. Raye buried her face into her neck and wept briefly. Snapping back up a second later, as anxious dread sunk it's teeth into her heart.

She was scared, to move...to do anything but stare down at Mina as she lay dieing in her arms. Kneeling on the floor tile, with Mina's head in her lap. Her arms wrapped securely around her shoulder's, holding her as tightly as she dared. She just knew she needed to focus, she couldn't take her eyes off of her lest she disappear with out her notice. She just looked so fragile now, as if the slightest breeze would shatter her like fine glass. So pale and lifeless, her features were relaxed having moved past the point of feeling constant pain. Her blonde hair hung limp, damp and bedraggled around her shoulders.

Raye had long since given up on encouraging Mina with optimistic platitudes. No more would she voice, that she was going to be ok, that help was coming...that she just needed to hang on just a little longer... Those words were all false and the lies tore at her heart. She ran her finger's tenderly through Mina's hair, brushing down from her temple to the very ends. Repeating the simple gesture of soothing her, finding little solace in the act for herself. Mina's eyes fluttered open briefly at her tender caress and she took a deep breath. Basking in Rayes affection for a moment before the action of breathing deeply, caused a wicked spasm of pain. Her calm face twisted in intense pain, grimacing and clamping her teeth together to hold back her cries of agony. As the fierce stabbing pain passed through her, ebbing away gently like the waves crashing upon the shore. The pain on her face faded away, as she lay in Rayes arms. Her chest rising and falling in jerky movements with the exertion of trying to breath.

"I'm tired." Mina spoke again a long time later.

"Then rest." Raye smiled painfully down at her, still brushing her hair sweetly with her fingers. The jagged line she balanced precariously on, between this crumbling edge of remaining calm and completely breaking down was torture. Her chest ached and the spasms of grief she felt at every breath burned painfully in her lungs. Sorrow was crushing her, a slow ever increasing weight that she was struggling to push through. Clearing her throat to steady her voice. As it had taken several gruelling minutes to summon the last of her emotional strength, to bear her soul and speak from her heart.

"I know that you wanted us to wait..." She took a shuddering breath, trying to still the quaking in her voice. Watching morbidly as the life continued to drain away from the only woman she would ever love. As the blood kept pooling beneath the soaked remains of her black dress. There was nothing she could do to stop the blood, compresses did nothing. They were drenched and useless in a matter of minutes. There was no more bandages in the first aid kit and most of her skirts were now shredded and laying in the ever growing pool of blood. The wound Mina suffered was fatal, Raye had acknowledged that minutes ago and gave up on compressing. Now she wished to only spend her last few minutes making sure Mina knew how much she was loved, how much she would be missed, before death claimed her.