Through Thick and Thin

The Mother Who Cared

I got up at 6:00, before my mother woke up. When it came to my mom, I tried to avoid her at all costs. Especially, after the argument we had last night. Mom is very insensitive. The only compassion I see from her is when she talks to guys she sets me up with, or anyone who doesn't live with us and knows how she actually is. It's sad, really. Well, and sometimes I see her kiss my dad goodbye but even after that she looks nonchalant about it. Like, nothing happened. It makes me angry to know the man she married and had kids with, and has been with for several years that that doesn't seem to matter to her. I thought married couples were supposed to be inseparable. It's as if she is miserable with him and just stays with him for his money, or maybe even a good image. But, she can keep that up by herself just fine. So, I really don't understand. I don't know, I should just stop thinking about it, because the thought just makes me sick. 

I get ready for school, sliding on my uniform and shoes. I put my hair up in it's usual style, put light makeup on, and go out the door. I check my phone, and immediately a smile appears on my face. 

It read, "Good morning, beautiful."

I replied, "Good morning, handsome. I can't wait to see you. I am about to leave the house, ok? So, be ready."

He texted me back, " Ok, ma'am. :)"

I got in my car, and turned on the playlist I made with all of my favorite Hatsune Miku songs. I start the car and put on the heat. I put it in in reverse. Then, I back out of the driveway and drive to Kazuto's place. It feels so lonely in the car without him. It is completely quiet, except for the music in the background. When he is with me, everything is more lively. He plays his music which I love. Recently, he has started to listen to a band from America. Half of the time, I don't know what he is saying but... I'm picking up on English so it'll be easier to understand later. Kazuto makes references here and there that makes me laugh. I park in the driveway, and pull on my coat while I text him that I am here. I turn off the heat, and close the door. I look in my mirror, then walk to his door. He walks out and slams the door behind him. I laugh a little. 

"What?"

"I just thought of something funny."

"What was it?"

"When you slammed the door, I thought... talk about closing the god.... door."

He got my reference, and we started laughing.

We get in the car, and he turns on one of the earlier albums they made. I dance a little in my seat, before I start the car. He giggles, and puts his hand on my thigh. We gaze into each other's eyes for a minute or so, then he kisses me on the cheek. I blush a little, then I started the car and drove. Feeling like I just won a gold medal. The way his lips feel, when he runs his hand through his hair, the look on his face when he spaces out, his eyes when the lights reflects off of them... he is so perfect but he doesn't think so. It makes me sad to see. But, when I think of all the little things he does that make my heart dance, I can't ever be unhappy. We approach the school and one of my favorite songs turns on. 

I bring my car to a halt, and I sigh. I look up to see Kazuto already opening the door. I take his hand, and give him a slight pull. He smiles at me, and gets what I am trying to say and sits back down. I giggle, and give him a kiss on the cheek. 

"Sorry, can we just finish this song? It is one of my favorites." 

"It is a good song."

I start to sing along, grabbing his hand once more. I pull it up, waving my arms in the air so he is forced to do the same. I giggle a little, and continue to sing. But, this time it is more like screaming the lyrics. He looks at me, a smile creeping on his face and starts to do the same. 

"I'm READY TO GOOOOO, OOOOOOH!!!! GET ME OUT OF MY MIND, GET ME OUT OF MY MINDDDDD!!!!" 

"I know I'm ready to go... get out of this car."

"It's almost over. Stop being such a spoil-sport," I stick it out my tongue, laughing my butt off. 

The song ends, and again he tries to leave so quickly. I grab his hand once more, pulling him back into his seat.

"Wait..." 

"What is it?"

"I..."

"I... what?"

"Just...come here for a second..." 

I am probably blushing... I can feel my legs shaking... this is so embarrassing...

"Asuna..."

We both lean in, meeting halfway. Our song turns on, Far Too Young To Die. I become developed in passion, and I can't stand the wait. We are so close... our lips almost touching... I can't take it. I crash my lips into his, pulling him closer. I close my eyes, and savor it. This may sound weird, but even after a couple of hours of not having him with me drives me insane. I guess, I am still not used to the idea that we don't spend night and day at our little cabin... we don't live together and in fact he lives around 15 minutes away. Yet, it has been several years since we met in SAO. It seems like yesterday. Wrapped in each other's arms, snuggling close for warmth by the fireplace, drinking coffee, telling each other secrets, and our pasts. It upsets me to know that it will probably be a couple more years before I can marry him. I need to save up for the wedding for one... And, I still need to have enough money after so we can rent an apartment. Plus, money for food, water... and bills in the early future. I don't think I can stand the wait... 

I pull away for breath, tears flowing down my eyes. I check the time, we are early... I look at him. The moment he laid his eyes on me, I could see the sadness in his eyes. A deep sunken feeling is felt in the bottom of my stomach... I hug him, snuggling him. I look up into his eyes for comfort. 

"I'm sorry... I just can't wait any longer. Kazuto, I want to marry you... I want to have a house with you... I want to spend the rest of my life with you..." 

I pull him closer, crying in his chest... 

"Asuna, you are the girl that I love. I feel the same, but I'm sorry... I am trying my best to get enough money saved up, ok? With your help at your job... we will have the money to do it soon I'm sure. But, for now we have to be patient. I love you. I am so sorry..." 

He hugs me tighter, giving me a kiss on my forehead. 

"We should probably go..."

"Yeah, I'm sorry too."

"Don't worry about it, ok? You have nothing you need to apologize for." 

We both go our separate ways to our classrooms. I hope that time flies by... so I can see Kazuto... I feel like it's a year when we are apart... an impossible year, really. I have high hopes that I will make it, though. I mean, I haven't died, yet. Right?