When He Sees Me

[1] Ben

High school sucks. It's a living hell hole filled with close-minded losers. Well, let me clarify. High school sucks if you're the only gay kid in your school, or even your whole town. It's as if there's some strange teenage gravitational pull that compels everyone that's within five feet of my vicinity to give me a nasty glare, an insult, and occasionally the infamous locker shove. However, those things have only happened in the past few years. It's 2018, and my senior year, so this year I'm hoping for a change.

Staying up all night on Skype with my best friend Jasmine was probably not the greatest way to spend the night before the first day of school. However, in my defense, we were talking about school related things. It's not important now, but let's just say that I'm totally getting a lead in this year's musical.

Theatre is my escape. It keeps me down to earth when times get rough with my classmates and their anger that they take out on me. If I just pretend like this is the way the show has to go, It'll all be over when the play ends.

"Benjamin?"

I heard the call from downstairs of my fathers large home. I recognized the voice as my stepmother, Heidi. A woman I truly despised. Although I haven't officially come out to my parents, I know Heidi suspects something from the way she treats me. It's like she thinks I'm her fabulous gay best friend or something.

I put on my black full-rim glasses, when I hear "Ben!" Heidi calls for me again, so I quickly throw on something simple; a black and white flannel over a white t-shirt, paired with skinny jeans rolled up at the ankles and white converse.

I grab my navy Jansport and run down the stairs, greeted by Heidi, my father and two step siblings. Addison and Jackson were both starting their sophomore year, and they seem to think that they're the best thing since sliced bread just because they're high school athletes, even if they are just on the swim team. Addy is a bit less annoying, but even still, I try to avoid hanging out with my step siblings as much as possible.

My dad owns a real estate agency in the town next to our home in Beaufort, North Carolina. He makes a good amount of money, and we live comfortably in a pretty nice house, so I should be thankful for what he does for his family. However, there's a reason I haven't come out to them, and a reason why I don't plan on doing so for a very long time. My dad, Henry Bernard, is a very conservative old school Christian, just like the rest of my relatives in his side. Every holiday with the relatives it's the same old conversation from grandparents, aunts and uncles:

"Do you have a girlfriend yet, Benji?"

"No ma'am." (or sir, depending on the family member)

"You'll find someone, you're just going through puberty. No girl finds high pitched voices and skinny and short boys attractive."

Which is basically just an insult to my and my size, and the fact that my voice is higher that most guys my age. Although according to the relatives, I've been going through puberty for about 7 years now.

The fact that my dad's side of the family will never accept me is fine, but I do prefer being at my mom's house. Liz White, my dear mother, is the sweetest woman out there. I'm her only child so I'm obviously her favorite, and she loves me more than anything in the world. My mom doesn't have much, just an old mutt, a small apartment with cheap furniture, and a waitressing job at the diner a few blocks from my school, but she still manages to make me happier when I'm at her house than when I'm with my dad. Even though I haven't told her I'm gay, I know she'll still love me no matter what, and that's why my mom is the best one out there.

"Are you ready for your senior year, son?" My dad asked me with a mouth full of toaster waffle.

"Yeah, I guess." I replied, grabbing my own waffle and sticking it in the toaster. As I was pouring myself a glass of milk, my dad asks another question.

"Are you doing theatre this year?"

I simply nodded and put my glass on the table, grabbing my warm waffle and setting it on a paper plate.

"Really? Why don't you join a sport or something?"

"Because I'm not a sports person. Plus, the twins are on a sports team, that should be good enough."

My dad shrugged "I just thought it could be nice to see my boy on a team this year."

"Well, you can see me in the musical." I replied in annoyance "I think I'll just eat in my car. I should get going anyways."

I heard Heidi say something about taking the twins with me, but I kept walking until I got to my small black Lexus in the driveway. I sat in the drivers seat, quickly downing my breakfast before I started the 8 mile drive to Beaufort High School, home of the Tigers. My school was a nice, fulls of upper-class kids whose parents had loads of money. Of course, It was zoned to my dads large house because my mom lived on the other side of town.

I pulled up to the school, parking in my new spot in the senior parking area. As I got out of my car, my bag on my back, I started the walk across the parking lot and entered through the doors of the student union, or the cafeteria as some would call it. As I started to look for familiar faces, someone grabbed my wrist tightly. Turning to face the person, a smile appeared on my face when I was greeted by my best friend, Jasmine.

"Jazzy!" I exclaimed, throwing my arms around the slightly taller girl.

"Benji!" She said back with same tone of excitement in her voice. "I haven't seen you in forever! Unless you count Skype, but I don't!"

"Right!? You look good, girl!" I said, admiring her straight shoulder length jet-black hair, her dark Filipino skin. She was wearing a maroon dress under a jean jacket, matched with a black Kendra Scott necklace and black combat boots.

Jasmine was one of the more popular girls at the school, due to her being in almost every club, a star soccer player, and president of our thespian troupe for three years now. However, she still chooses to be my best friend over the snobby cheerleaders and other popular girls.

"Thanks! You don't look too bad yourself." Jazzy said, her tone positive and happy as always. "Oh, hey! I want you to meet someone, Ben."

Jasmine moved aside and a girl with gorgeous curly auburn hair falling over her freckled pale skin moved up next to her.

"My name is Charlotte, most people call me Charlie, though." Said the girl in a thick German accent.

"Ben. Nice to meet you!" I said, reaching out to shake her hand.

As our hands met, Jazzy started talking "Charlie's a foreign exchange student from Germany, and she's joining theatre!"

"Nice. You'll love theatre, the people are really sweet. You'll fit right in." I said to Charlie, letting go of her soft hand.

"So, whose house are you staying at, Charlie?" I asked, as the three of us sat down at a corner lunch table in the cafeteria, where all students went before school started.

"Um, I believe her name is Ella, or Ellie? Do you know her? She's a senior, too."

Jazzy looked at me, and I looked right back at her, and we both said at the same time;

"Ellie Taylor!?"