Reviving Her

Chapter 12 : Flying

"We never realize how frozen we are
Until someone starts to melt our ice."
- Bridgett Devoue
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'Go home, Zara' he says through clenched teeth, his hands folded into fists making his nerves stand out.

I stare at him dumbly, my ears not believing what he said.

'But...this is my home.' I take a hesitant step to him. He towers over me, his broad shoulders dwarfing me.

'I don't want you here.' His voice rises. I touch his hand and he flinches, recoiling from my touch. The air seems to be sucked out of the room. I struggle to breathe.

'You can't mean that.'  My voice breaks, desperation sets in.

'Things haven't been perfect but we can deal with this. I'm sorry for whatever I did, please let us fix this. We can make it through, together Numair. I need you, please don't leave me.' I beg as a lone tear leaks out, followed by another that rolls down my cheek.

He grabs me, his arm behind me and the other wipes away my tear. He holds my face within his hands forcing me to meet his eyes. His almond brown eyes stare defiantly back at me. My heart breaks a little more at the coldness I see in them. Though his stance seems to portray harshness his touch is as gentle as ever.

'It's NOT you, there is nothing you can do to fix it. I don't want you here. Get it?' I feel his hands tremble with rage around my face, his eyes red, livid with anger.

'Just go.' I feel his lips on my forehead and then I'm pushed away. 'I'll help you pack.', is all that he says.

I jerk up from my bed.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

I touch my cheek to find it wet with tears; as expected. Ziyan sleeps soundly on the bed adjacent to mine with his arm thrown over his head. Dim orange lights up the room.

I wipe my cheeks and pull the covers over my shoulders. I mull over my dream, a striking picture of my last day with Numair at our house. I had relived the moment so many times. I had imagined and reimagined what otherwise I could have done to change that moment. Now that memory haunts me in my nightmares.

And I'm as helpless as I was that day. I didn't change anything then and now I simply can't.

***

When I wake up, Ziyan's bed is empty. He must have left without me. I head down to breakfast in a rush. I find them seated on a central table in the restaurant. I scan the table, mom, dad, Adam, Ziyan and Maaz. Ira and Eliza are missing. That means they have overslept as well. I wonder if they even slept at night, perhaps at the break of dawn.

'Come join us.' Uncle Adam says.

Maaz pulls out the chair beside him.

'Thanks. I'll be back.' I place my phone on the table and head to the breakfast buffet. I load my plate with a croissant, a Danish roll and grab a small pack of butter and honey.

'How would you like your egg Ma'am ?' The chef asks me.

'Sunny side up please, just one.' I'm impressed when he flips the egg by tossing it into the air and catching it in the pan.