Centennial Spiral

Ahote and Leotie

Seven or eight lifetimes came and went, and Riagán's soul was unable to make his love believe in their bond. He feared nothing would ever change. The lifetimes where his soul was in a woman's body were the most frustrating, because the lower status of the female never gave him the opportunity to even connect with his twin-flame. It was as if Saoirse spent entire lifetimes completely dormant. The mark of each failure and the loss incurred began to darken him.

The Universe decided to wake their souls somewhere altogether new. As Riagán grew into adolescence, and his soul awakened within a young man called Restless One or Ahote in the desert plains of what is now North America. He was immediately aware of the flame in Beautiful Clouds Rising or Leotie, a girl a little younger who Ahote had played with for many years.

Ahote and Leotie

     "Leotie!" Leotie recognized the voice and smiled. She stood, turning to see Ahote running up to her grinning. Ahote was her best friend in the world. Sometimes she imagined that he could walk with her in her dreams. Other times she thought she had flashes of her future, with him holding her hand and making a home together. She had been promised at a very young age to Sparrow or Kele. Kele was a fine young man, but he was six years older than she. In her fifteen years of life, she knew nothing about him as a person. She would most likely be married to him within the year, and he was little more than a stranger.
     "Leotie, look at my haul, it was a good day to hunt. The gods had favor on us." He showed her several rabbits and looked behind him to call her attention to two deer being cleaned by his mother and sisters.
     "I told you that Kachina doll I made for you would bring you prosperity." She said this at a whisper, because the gift had to remain asecret. It was no little thing for a Hopi girl to give a Kachina doll to a boy. She was only just allowed to make the dolls, and she had given her first one to Ahote. He smiled down at her. She loved his smile, he rarely allowed himself to smile, so she felt special each time she caught it. His dark eyes surveyed her, and she felt like he was calling her his own. He caught a wayward strand of her dark silky hair and tried to help her tame it back in her squash blossom hair. The style was bulky and hurt her head, but it was the only way girls her age wore their hair. Flashes of a life with Ahote filled her head as they touched. She could have sworn that he was seeing them as well, it was like her feelings were reflected in his eyes.
     "Leotie!" Her father called. She saw a shadow pass over Ahote's face and felt her own heart drop for it.
     "I have to go. I am proud of your hunt. I am happy that I could bring you favor." She tried to let him see her heart in her gaze, but he broke it and turned away from her. She hated to watch him walk away.
     "Leotie, why did you stop what you were doing to talk to Ahote? I thought you had outgrown that boy. You are too old to play with him as you once did as a child. If you want the company of a boy, you must choose your intended. You need to get to know him before he becomes your husband." Her father, was Hania which means Spirit Warrior. Everyone trusted him as one of the wise who was in contact with the spirits of the ancestors. No one spoke against him, and his council was always cherished. The tribe all congratulated her and told her what a lucky daughter she was to have him as a father. When he chose Kele for her there was a large feast and celebration. She was four and Kele was ten. She had tried to hold his hand and he refused her. He never seemed willing to be around her as they grew up. She could tell he watched her, felt possessive of her, but he did not interact with her.
     "Kele does not care to know me." She mumbled.
     "He does today. Today marks the six month time before you will be married. You may spend all the time needed to know him before you marry. He will also be building your home during that time."
     Leotie saw Kele standing a little ways off, looking at her expectantly. She took a deep breath and swallowed hard. Her heart was unhappy in the moment, but her mind told her this was what was best since it was what her father wanted. She went to Kele, he looked into her eyes, but she saw nothing of depth in them. She felt no connection, no flashes of the future. She was disappointed, but told herself that she would just have to give it time. He turned to be by her side and they walked to where he was planning to build their house.
     Ahote watched as Leotie talked with Kele, something within him was burning with jealousy and rage. How could she continue down the path laid out for her when they had the connection they did? From the time they were children they played together, they pretended to be partners. He would hunt and protect her, she would make the home for them. She was his, did she not see it? He felt such intense frustration, more so than he used to feel. Her betrothment was not a new thing, but recently it seemed like a barrier he needed to destroy. It wasn't impossible to break a contract like this. He could petition her father, he could tell him how he loved her and would be able to provide a good life for her. He would have to prove himself to Hania. Even though he was three years younger than Kele, within the last few months he had grown in strength and confidence. It was like he had hit his stride. He was beginning to think that these changes within him were signs that he should make a claim and try to make the life he was sure was his fate happen.
     How could he convince Hania that he, Ahote, could share his daughter's dreams? That he could feel her emotions as if they were his own, and sometimes he was sure they were seeing the same thoughts. The more he realized this, the more he explored it. He wished he could talk to her about it, and see if he was right. He would have to figure out how to be alone with her so they could talk. Being alone was no easy thing in a Hopi pueblo. He would have to find a way, and soon.
     It took days of covertly watching Leotie and her family's routines, but he was able to catch her in the field one early morning and pull her away to the shadow side of a crumbling adobe wall. He turned her to face him and willed her to feel the intensity of his emotions. His love, his desperation, his certainty that she was his and he was hers. He wanted to talk to her, but couldn't get the words out. His breathing began to be heavy and rapid.
     "I know, but what can we do? What my father says is taken like law." Leotie spoke in a tender voice as she laid a brave hand on  his heaving chest.
     "You know what I'm thinking?" He asked. She smiled at him, and cocked her head to the side. It suddenly struck him how ridiculous that hairstyle was, and until today, he had thought it beautiful.
     "You've been yelling at me for days now." She cast her eyes down to her moccasins, and he couldn't stand it. He wanted to touch her chin and pull her eyes back to his.
     "You have been spending more time with Kele, and your father has been telling everyone that he is building your house. When the house is done, you will be married." He choked down his urge to sob.
     "Yes, he has made that decision." She was still not looking at him. "But that is not what I dream about."
     He was instantly excited, this was what he wanted to know.
     "What are your dreams like, Leotie?"
     "I think you know..." She finally looked up at him. He read in her eyes the answers and questions.
     "Yes, I think I know too." He admitted.
     "You walk with me in my dreams, you have for a long time."
      "Yes."
     "I feel like you now have control in my dreams, like you can direct yourself." She looked past him to the red sandy rock behind him.
     "Yes."
     "I hear you when you aren't actually talking to me."
     He closed his eyes, he was so relieved he wanted to cry, but he never let tears drop. That sort of thing was for children. "What are we going to do?"
     "I can't do anything. If you want me the way I have seen in my dreams, you have to convince my father."
     "I will do anything to be with you."
     "Leotie, your contract with Kele has been challenged. Do you know about this?" Her father sat beside her as she worked on her beading.
     "Yes father, it is Ahote, we have always felt connected, ever since we were children." She didn't look up, she was afraid that her father's comforting mood may turn sour.
     "Would you rather be his wife than Kele's? Even though he has almost finished a fine house for you. He is already a proven young man, with the respect of his people. Even after you have spent hours with him and gone on many walks in the evening, even though you have been meant to be his bride for most of your life?" His voice was rising, and it made her feel anxious, but after all Ahote had done, she had to be true to their connection.
      "Yes father, I feel that the spirits are telling me that it is Ahote that was meant to be my partner in life, not Kele. Kele is a fine man, and has been very pleasant to me. We just don't have any connection to each other. I don't think he has any real feelings for me. Ahote and I feel everything for each other." As she said this, she did allow her eyes to raise and look to her father.
     "You are my daughter, and I do not wish to assume I am the only one in our family with a connection to the spirits. I will have to think on this, and connect with them as well. If they give me a task for him, I am willing to allow him to prove himself. If he is worthy, I may allow you to break with Kele. If it is as you say, he may also love another."
     When Hania left his daughter's room, Leotie's youngest sister, Pamuy or Water-moon, came in and sat next to her.
     "Don't let Ahote do this." She said softly, taking Leotie's hand.
     "What Pamuy? Why not? Pamuy, Ahote and I have a connection I cannot explain to you, but I know that we are supposed to be together. He was meant to be my other half. It has to be!" She watched as tears dropped from Pamuy's eyes. Shocked, Leotie smoothed her sister's long, loose hair trying to sooth her.
     "He's going to die. If you allow him to do what father asks of him, he will be left behind and Kele will come back. Not just Ahote, but many others. Listen to me!" She cried desperately.
      "Shh little moon, you are scared over nothing. Father isn't going to ask any of the boys to risk their lives. We are a peaceful tribe, we don't go off to war." Her sister was inconsolable. She pulled the young girl into her lap and rocked her, she sang to her, she put a bracelet she was meaning to surprise her with on her wrist, but nothing helped. This continued for days, but Leotie and Ahote remained steadfast that their path was meant to be together, no matter what, and this was the only way.
     Two weeks later a scout came back with information that a group of Navajo were riding toward them with weapons and war paint. Hania asked Kele and Ahote to take the boys that were their age, arm them and give them the best horses, and meet the Navajo in the desert before they reached the pueblo. Pamuy, who had barely eaten a thing since her attempts to stop Leotie and Ahote began to scream and writhe around. She begged Ahote not to go, she told Leotie to give up her dreams, begged her father to think of anything else. She cried, screamed and begged herself sick, she suddenly went silent and dropped to the ground. Leotie ran to her, but Kele was there first. He picked the child up and took her to the family's home. He laid her down on a blanket and looked over sadly at Leotie.
     "I am sorry if I have made you feel that I would not want you to be my wife. It was not my intention to make you feel this way. I would still have you, if you will have me." With this, he turned and left her before she could speak.
Leotie stayed by her sister's side for hours, even when her mother insisted she go and help in the field or go back to work on her beading. It wasn't until the sounds of return came in the night that told them the men were back from the desert that Pamuy's eyes to flutter.
     "Go and see, Leotie." She rasped. "He's gone." Tears dropped down her still closed eyes.
     Leotie went out to see the returning group of her tribesmen, there were far fewer than the number that left. She saw Kele; tall, strong, beautiful Kele, still on horseback. He turned to her and sadness passed over his face. She went to him with her heart in her throat, she barely noticed that her best friend, Muna, was beside her also looking for a man she loved. Kele looked at both of them.
     "Muna, I'm sorry, but Ayawamat is with his ancestors now." Muna dropped instantly to the ground sobbing, Leotie dropped beside her confused. She held her friend in her arms until Muna's family came to help her home. Kele had dismounted by that time, but stayed watching as always. When Muna was gone, Leotie stood up and turned to Kele feeling numb.
     "Kele..." With sadness, Kele placed his rough hand on her bare left shoulder.
     "Ahote has gone to be with his ancestors Leotie, I am sorry you are hurt by this." The emptiness began to consume her almost instantly. She felt herself falling, but was held up by the man she was going to abandon. She had no fight left in her, she succumbed and allowed him to hold her. Her knees gave way, he bent down and pulled her up fully in his arms. He held her close to him, she could feel his heart beating in his chest. "I meant it this morning when I told you I would still have you. I know you are broken now, but I will be there to help you heal."
     Leotie closed her eyes as she felt part of her soul close off in grief. She knew then that she had been joined by a guide, and that she should have listened to her little sister. They should have found another way, or accepted her father's wishes, then at least Ahote and Ayawamat would be alive. If there hadn't been a task to prove, those men would not be been sent out to meet warriors. Their people were not warriors, they were peaceful diplomats. The deaths of her people, and her friend's broken heart were her fault. Her very soul cried out in bitter disappointment in her lack of foresight and understanding. She surrendered in Kele's arms to her new fate, whatever the ancestors may deem it to be. She would no longer try to take it into her own hands, but she would never forget her love, her Ahote.