My Billionaire Saviour

10- Guilt

Emily's POV

I woke up with a severe headache..... That's something I hate the most. Well everyone does.

Wait a minute.....

What happened yesterday? And then it hit me... Jacob drugged me! How could he? Why is he like that? I am pissed and I am not pissed at him but at myself how could I let someone so close to me, how could I keep my guard down, how could I let lose. That's it. I am done with myself wtf is wrong with me.

Why are you always seeking attention, I mean always being sad, trying to appear mysterious. What is wrong with you. You know you deserve punishment and I hope you know what you are supposed to do.

The voice in my head was right. I am stupid I am always seeking attention, always being sad, always trying to seek sympathy. I hate everything about me.

I did bought some with me I need a relief. Where's my bag? I tried to search for my bag and it was on one of the leather chair that was in the room I picked it up and searched for the blades but there weren't any. It can't be I searched it in my other bag as well but there was nothing. But I perfectly remember keeping them in my bag. I searched the entire room for anything sharp but to my surprise there wasn't anything. When I looked around he room I realized I've made a mess of the room but I couldn't care less

Nothing ever good happens with me what is wrong with me i am so stupid I can't even keep a blade safe. I sat on the floor with my head in my hands. I can't cry, I don't even know how to cry so I just sit there picking on my old scabs and drawing some blood I was disturbed by a knock on my door and I knew who that would be. I hurriedly got up from the floor anf got into the washroom and I closed the door.

Third person's POV

"Emily" Jacob said entering the room there was no Emily but the room was a mess. The drawers were open, all the stuff of her bag was on the floor. Jacob immediately understood what she was trying to do. Even though he has removed anything she could have used his mind went immediately to the mirror in the washroom. He got really anxious and start banging on the door. "Emily, Emily are you okay?! Emi-" his voice was cut by opening of the bathroom door where stood Emily In a perfectly formal attire. She decided to look act as if she doesn't remember anything from the last night. "Mr. Whiteley? What are doing here? We have a meeting from 9.3p 0 why aren't you ready? Are you fine?" Emily said looking directly into his eyes. But Jacob knew better than to buy her pretense. "Oh yes that's ey I am here I wanted t ask you when is the meeting. Well I'll see you by the car in 15 minutes"
Emily just nodded. None of them spoke about the last night. And ignored the mess of the room.

Jacob's POV

After meeting I asked Emily where would she want to eat and she said tat she's not hungry. She didn't question me about last night, didn't say a word about it. Just called me 'Mr. Whiteley' maybe she's pissed at me and doesn't want to talk to me anymore but it's not my concern at the moment. She needs to talk to me. She needs to open up and tell me things. It will eat her up if she continues to be so distant and closed off.

I was in my thoughts when I heard a hiss my head immediately turned to Emily she quickly composed herself. Then it hit me she was picking up on her old cuts.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked her didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable.

She gave me a forced smile "yes yes absolutely"

After a while we arrived at the hotel. She quickly got out of the car. "I will just go to the room I am really tired plus cars make me sick" with that she left me.

She hasn't eaten anything since morning so I ordered some food and asked her to join me and to my surprise she didn't deny, she didn't fight she just came ate some food and excused herself.

Why is she behaving like this? I know she knows that I drugged her last night but why is not questioning me? Why is being so distant and why is being so normal?

I feel guilty now. I should have waited for her to come to me instead of forcing things out of her. Ugh why am I so stupid. I really fucked it up. I thi k I should apologise to her and with that thought in my mind i went to her room and knocked....

Hate me please, its been two years and now when I read it I there are few things I would like to change but first I need to finish this one. Don't worry I won't disappoint yo7 all this time... Let me know if ya'll liked this or not