The Struggle of Summer

Chapter 2

I woke up in the nurses office. I don't remember how I got there, just, that I was there. I slowly sat up and I could now feel the huge pain in my skull.

"Oh, you're awake. Yes, just in time too. I was about to call the paramedics." The school nurse jabbered on.

"Yeah.." I replied slowly sitting up, rubbing where my head was pounding.

"You're lucky you have a friend like Isabella. Yes, she came running to tell me you had fallen and knocked your self unconscious. Yes, you must have been doing something extreme to have knocked yourself unconscious. You're lucky you didn't hit your head on the table. That could have been dangerous." The nurse pattered on to herself again.

"Yeah.. Lucky.." I sighed, knowing that wasn't what happened, but there was no point in arguing.

After she took a few 'tests' she advised I head home for the day. I agree and thank her. As I was walking out of the nurses offices, I walked past the cafeteria. I paused for a moment and peered in. I happened to catch Brad's eyes; he looked apologetic. But suddenly, Isabella noticed and twisted herself to look at who he was looking at. I quickly darted behind the open door and hope to the heavens above, she didn't see me. I slowly move up so see through the window and see that she has now turned around and is sucking faces with Brad. I scoff and keep walking until I'm sitting at the bus stop with an armful of books.

The bus arrived a short time later and I hopped on. I scanned my card and sat down. I was the only one on the bus. I sat at the back, as far to the right as I could. I placed my bag on the seat next to me so no one could sit there if they even wanted to try. I tried to retrieve my earphones for the deep depths of my school bag and plugged them into my phone. I put my music on shuffle and tried to relax; well as much as you can with a migraine thumping against my scull.

Once I arrived home, it was empty, like I had expected. Mum is away on a 3 week business trip and my dad, well that's anyone's guess. Probably off fucking hookers or smoking some illegal drug on a daily basis, or both. I threw my backpack into the crevice between the bookshelf and the wall by accident but ignored it and tried to make it to my room without falling over. I got half way up the stairs and stopped and I crumbled. I was a mess, a ball of tears and sorrows on the stairs, with no one to hold me and say everything will be ok, that i will make it, because at this point, that's all I really need.

After about 10 minutes, I tried to compose myself enough to get to my room to sleep. As I slowly stood up, I held so tight onto the railing of the stairs my knuckles were white. I gradually made my way to the bathroom where I stood and looked at myself in the large mirror. While I stared into my dull grey eyes, the only words going around my head were, 'you're so stupid, no boy would ever want you, you're a useless prick, no one appreciates you, your so ugly, just do everyone a favour and kill yourself, everyone hates you.' I tore my eyes away and took a deep breath. My hand was itching to open the bottom cupboard and see what I could use to ease this pain, but I quickly walked to my room and flopped onto my bed. I sighed and though out loud, "I know I'm right, No one needs me here, I could just end it and everyone's lives could continue as normal. But what's stopping me??" I slowly closed my eyes, and drifted off to sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hey guys,

Look, I know it's been a while but I'm back and writing.

I had (and still am) having a rough time with a while bunch of different things and I just needed a break. School was getting to the crunch time and I buckled under the pressure.

But alas, here is the new chapter.

Thanks for the reads, votes and comments,

Love you all.

Xoxox

_crazystupidlove_