🥀"i'm getting tired"🥀
JJk's POV
I squirm under the bright sun making it's way to my room throught the shutters I squint my eyes trying to adjust to the light washing away the darkness of my room but not the one inside me. The rays spreads warmth over my skin like kisses from the divine, the wind outside travel in my room like a invisible ghost bringing chills through my spine, it's autumn and it's beautiful even when everything is dying I sit up after what seemed like hours and reach up to feel my face which is still damped with tears. I wonder if I cried myself to sleep again or was it a nightmare. My bed is warm and the room is cold, I want to remain in it forever but my feet still swing open in the chill and I find my way to my bathroom to get ready for school.
I went inside and look in the mirror, my face damped, eyes still red and puffy, lips parted, hair messy I feel disgusted in my gut every time I look in the mirror, I wish to see something different something better everyday but it's the same damn pathetic face.
Not wanting to look for long I direct my gaze to the floor and strip myself naked without sparing any glance in the mirror I step under the shower, the feeling of the warm water on my skin specially on my fresh cuts feels like daggers penetrating through..it hurts but it still feel nice, it's a reminder of my life, the truth I like to hide, it makes me realize I'm not as happy as I claim to be as people see or as I make them see me. It's the harsh reality that it's not all glittery and glitzy but it's dark and painful.
After stepping out of the shower I once again look in the mirror this time only to adore the scars, I sometimes really like them it's like art on my body, a code to my heart, the untold words it's everything and nothing what I am. I grab a full sleeves shirt and denim jeans and dress myself for the day.
I live in a hostel so there is nobody to remind me of breakfast it's easier to diet this way. I don't want to become fat and have another reason to dislike my life. So i head staring towards my school which is 5 minutes away.
On my walk, I drift my thoughts towards how im gonna keep up today with all these lies I'm tired of pretending but that's the only option I have more like that's what I chose so try my best to already keep up my "happy" face and prepare my self for another acting session of my life
The chatter of the students fills up my ear, as I enter my school, the unwanted gossip that I really wanna ignore end up in my brains
"Did u guys hear that Namjin is real?"
I chuckled as I already know that ...
"Taehyung was making out with Irene again" a girl squeaked.
My breath hitched at the name which sounds all too familiar, the name which can make my numb senses awake again, a name which makes me believe that I do feel emotions other than just emptiness. I try to hear more without making it obvious.
" Yeah it must be one of his flings" another girl said.
I sighed in contentment on the fact it's nothing serious it's not like it's my concern anyways.
Kim Taehyung, the captain of the football team, the kinka, has looks that can kill, stubborn spoiled rich brat who doesn't gives a fuck about anyone except his friends who also rule the school, nobody dares to mess up with them unless they want their school life to practically end. He is also my undeniable crush I know it sounds pathetic that I fell for this jerk but believe me I tried not to, I don't know if it was cold face or his mysterious aura, if it was his sharp jawline, his boxy smile, his dark orbs, his blonde locks or if it was the way he helped his friends, his way of hiding his love for kids which apparently only I was lucky enough to witness that too accidently he doesn't shows it to people because he has a reputation to keep, I still remember the giddy feeling I felt the day I saw him helping a kid who was being bullied by his friends, he looked so mature so different of what he is at school.......it was all of this and more which made me fall for him, someone so out of my reach who doesn't even know of my existence and is potentially straight. But no one knows about this little crush of mine and I don't intend to tell anyone anytime soon.
YOU ARE READING
Wilted Lies
Fanfiction"I'm okay" Is that what you wanted me to say.. In which Jeon jungkook is pathological liar who pretends to be happy in front of his friends. He is tired of being someone he is not, he wants to let it out but he is afraid to be judged and to be piti...
