Spirits of Mirror Lake

Normalcy

"AMBER, YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE FOR SCHOOL!"

The sound of my mother's voice interrupted my deep sleep, penetrating my dreams until I finally began to open my eyes. The sun had yet to awake, so I was greeted by the pale moonlight streaming in through my diaphanous curtains. The time on my alarm clock warned me that I had only ten minutes to get ready for school if I didn't want to be late. Reluctantly, I unraveled myself from the comfort of my covers and rose out of bed. I couldn't be bothered this early in the morning to turn any lights on, so I dressed in the dark, only stumbling slightly when I tripped over a pile of dirty clothes that I had yet to wash.

Pulling myself together, I finally made it downstairs to be greeted by my mom who was far too alive at this ungodly hour. It was unusual to see her awake before I leave for school, however today was my 17th birthday and I suppose she wanted to make an exception to try to make today special. While, I appreciated the gesture, I could tell she was trying too hard to try to make it seem like everything was okay, that nothing had changed. But it had changed. This would mark the first of many birthdays without my father, who had died recently. We got by without him, if not with difficulty, but today would just be a reminder about how our family's life will never be the same. Put simply, I just wanted to get through the day without any surprises or events out of the normal. Looking at my mom's plastered on smile, I could toss that dream out of the window. 

"Happy birthday Amber! I know how much you miss your father, but I promise that today will be extra special for you, and I know that if he were here today he would be proud of the woman you've become. I made you waffles for breakfast, but it looks like you'll have to take them to go if you don't want to miss the bus."

I sat there patiently while she gave the generic speech you would expect after losing a parent, nodding along, and eventually rewarding her with a disingenuous smile. The same one I had learned to perfect over the months following my father's passing to satisfy the nosy and prodding members of our small community. I used it so much now that I couldn't remember what my real smile looked like anymore. Lost in my thoughts, I finally came back to reality when my mom notified me that the bus had arrived. I hugged her goodbye before walking out the door. She may not understand how to reach me, but she's still my mother and she has been doing the best she is able. I know that she's in pain too, but she hides it just as well as I do, if not better. The only signs of sadness showing when she talks about him, but even then it's only a fleeting faraway look, so quick you can never be sure it was ever even there. But then there are the nights, few and far between, when late at night I would lay in bed and hear the sobs of a mourning widow who had lost the love of her life. Those were the hardest.

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Time never seemed to pass during the school day. I spent most of the day sitting in the back of my classes, staring out the window, longing for the never ending droning of my teachers to end. I had been raining all day, but I didn't mind. This was my favorite weather. Most people thought me odd to feel this way, and instead appreciated the few days a year that it isn't raining. The sound of the rain softly pattering on the window, while the thick clouds covered the sun and gave the earth a soft glow always lulled me into a sense of clarity peace of mind. Unfortunately, my day dreaming was interrupted by the sound of my English teacher's voice. 

"Ms. Spade, would you care to answer the question?", she said, casting a disappointing look in my direction.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Abbot, what was the question again?", I replied reluctantly.

"Nothing of importance it seems if you can't be bothered to listen to my lesson. Please pay attention in the future, Amber. Since this seems to be becoming a habit for you lately, expect to be called on a lot more."