Love Potions and Other Desperate Measures

1: Mind Over Matter

If you dream that you're over him, you're not.

"Royce, I love you!" Luc screamed from the top of his lungs. I cringed. I hated my name. It was the bane of my existence. I mean, what kind of parents would name their daughter "Royce"? I stared at Luc. In his loose, faded jeans and his too-tight shirt, he looked like a pathetic back-up dancer. He was definitely not boyfriend material. He was barely even friend material. He was always absent-minded, clumsy, and tripping over the fringes of his own pants. I always thought he was like a big baby, for with all his size and muscle, he was always a blubbering mess around me. He was too easy for me, not at all a conquest. I'd known he was into me the first time I saw him staring at me three years ago.

Unfortunately.

"I beg your pardon?" I raised my eyebrows at him. When he didn't reply, I shrugged and turned to leave.

"I love you, Royce Oliver," He muttered, seemingly embarrassed and lost his guts. I turned around and saw that his brown eyes looked moist, like he was about to cry.

Ugh. 

"I see," I replied coolly. "And what do you want me to do with this information, Luc?" I switched my weight to my other foot. This was getting old fast. I gripped my umbrella harder, mentally cursing myself because I hadn't left the classroom earlier. The rain was pelting down like a hailstorm; the big, fat, heavy drops of water made loud sounds as they fell on the ground and on my flimsy umbrella. And speaking of umbrellas, Luc didn't have one. He was just there, twenty feet away from me, soaking wet and blushing and totally lost in the moment. Well, he could enjoy the moment all he wanted. He was alone in that place. I knew this day was going to come. I'd known it for years, and I dreaded it. My best friend, Mara Solstice, had been in love with this doofus for four years. Four freaking years. Before he even met me. And of course, he just had to fall for the unassuming best friend. What did I do? I never even pulled my moves on him. I didn't even hang out with him. I never even shared more than a few words with him the whole three years I'd known him. I hated Luc Freighting. I hated him with all my heart and soul. He was evil personified, not because he was a jerk, but because he was a totally nice guy. A totally nice guy that my best friend was pining for. A totally nice guy who, for reasons unfathomable to me, chose to like me instead.

"Can I... ask you out?" the shirt he wore clung to his torso in a weird way, and I fought the urge to throw up. "... On a date, I mean." he continued.

I bared my teeth. Luc, thinking I was smiling at him, beamed at me, like I'd just given him the best gift in the world. His smile revolted me and made me hate him even more, because it reminded me of what he was doing to my best friend. Not that I needed any reminding; just the sound of his name never failed to turn me into a huge ball of fury. He looked so full of hope though, so I made my smile brighter just to make him feel really hopeful. It would hurt worse if he fell from a higher place.

And I dropped the bomb. The oh-my-god, I-planned-this-line-for-years, certified-to-turn-Luc's-heart-into-roadkill bomb:

"Uh, no. Eww, Luc, get over yourself."

I made myself look as disgusted as I could be—which was not the hardest thing to do, since my disgust was 100% authentic. 

At first I thought he didn't hear me. Then came the facial expressions: shock, embarrassment and eventually, shame. I reveled in his agony. 

"What... But I... I thought..."

I dismissed him and turned to leave. "Go away, Luc," I said, "Before I throw up."

I felt so good, so smug, until my alarm clock woke me up. I looked around me, disoriented and disappointed. It was just a dream. In a sense, it was a good dream. I wished it were real. I looked at my cell phone and reread a message that Luc sent me last night: 

Sup, R? Help me pick a gift 4 Mara?

My eyes filled with tears. Mara wasn't the one with unrequited feelings. Mara wasn't the one head-over-heels for a guy she couldn't have. It was me, I was the Mara in my dream. Luc loved my best friend with all his heart, and I was the ugly, pathetic one. Because even after four long years of painful pining, even after so much tears and sorrow, I still loved him.