Poems book one

One time i lost

What happened
What did it feel like
Did it hurt
Did you cry
Don't leave out a single detail
Tell me everything.

When I was younger I looked out the window and cried
It was raining
Or I wish it was so I wasn't the only one crying

There are 5 stages of grief that everyone goes through, or at least we are supposed to go through,
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

Let's go through the stages
5
4
3
2
1

Denial, stage 1
You didn't leave
*bump bump*
You're still at home waiting for me 
*bump bump*
You're at the door waiting for me to join you
You didn't die!
*bump*
That's you next to me, I fell your heart beat
*bum-*
You didn't walk out on me again!
I'll be with you when I open the door
You're still watching tv with mom
You're in your room waiting for me to join
You couldn't leave
But you did
You left again didn't you
You left

Anger, stage 2
You did leave!
You left me again and didn't even say good bye!
How could you do this to us again!
How could you decide to walk out that door and slam it on my face!
I am you! Don't you know that?!
It hurts so much!
You did this you asshole!
You left your family! But you want me to go with?!
I'll fell the shards till you return!
But you'll leave again, and it'll hurt worse!
Why do I keep doing this to myself
That's it
Maybe it's me
I can change

Bargaining, stage 3
I can change for you
I'll be nicer
I'll listen more
I'll join you this time
I'll kill my self to be with you
I'll stay away
I can change for us
For our family
We can be together again
We'll be a family
I know it's my fault so I'll change
I can change
I'll do it
Even if I pull a trigger
Even if I have to jump or step off the chair
I can walk out to this time
You're worth it
But you don't want me to change do you?
I can't change I've tried
But it's my fault isn't it

Depression, stage 4
I know it's my fault
You left cause I was trash that didn't deserve you
You walked out cause of me
It hurts
It hurts so much with out you
The cuts are back
The voices tell me what you really thought
I know I screwed up
I'm trash at your feet that you kicked away from you
I know that I didn't deserve you
You left again so I would fell pain that I deserved
I'm sorry I shouldn't have let you
I'm sorry
The crown of thorns making blood go into my eyes so I can't see you
It's my fault
It's my fault
It's my f-
No it's not
It's not something I did
It can't change can it?

Acceptance, stage 5
You did leave
It's not my fault
We can't be a family again
I can't change cause I'm not at fault
You left cause you needed to
Stage 5 the final stage
The one I should be at
........ but you didn't leave
Your still at home right?
You wouldn't leave
You couldn't leave!