The (Almost) End of Me

So to begin with, I'm going to say every persons name because 1.) I'm petty 2.) it's a lot easier to to explain this.
It all started on day at a basketball game. We had just played and we were watching the boys play. So I guess I got a girl mad or something because when a boy from our team got a free throw, she would say stuff like, "Come on let me hear that wish!!!" I told her to be quiet 1.) because she was yelling and everyone was looking at us 2.) when I'M playing I need to concentrate and I want to let other people concentrate too. So I'm guessing she got mad idk really.
We soon go to Chick-fil-a to get food for the ride home. (All of the girls and the boys and the coaches because it was an out of town game.) We get in there wait for our food and get back on the bus. So at the end of the bus there are 3 seats instead of the classic two seats. Mackenzie, Barbara, and Jessica were all sitting there. There was a pair of seats ( I hope I'm making sense) in between them and me. I was minding my business FaceTime-ing my Best Friend Celeste on Snapchat eating my fries and drinking my Dr.Pepper. All of a sudden, after I ended the call (cause the Coach's toddler was sleeping and she said she'd kill us if we woke him up), I feel something cold being thrown at me. (Something I forgot to mention was that this was around the end of January beginning of February of 2018 so it was mid winter!!) I mean imagine being cold and have ICE thrown at you around 8 or 9 at night when it's FREEZING COLD!! I don't know about you but I was having none of it. I didn't know WHO threw it but I got some ice (I was intending to get a handful bet I only got a few cubes of ice) back. They threw even more. So I remove the lid off my drink (I had finished my drink talking to my bsf) and threw the WHOLE thing at them.
They were screaming and stuff and STILL threw a little more ice. I couldn't deal with it so I moved up a seat to be away from them. Now I know, "Its just a little ice!! What could that have done to you?" Well hold on let me finish. They stopped for a little bit. And threw just like 3 or 4 more cubes. I got up and told them to stop. Not like face to face but from my seat. I thought to myself, " That should do it," because I'm not a confrontational person and I have the habit of staying quiet the few times when people are mean to me and stuff like that. I put my earbuds in and ate my sandwich which I couldn't even enjoy.
When we finally got into town, I started backing my things when I remembered that I had let Mackenzie borrow my portable charger. Just GREAT!! She ends up coming to me and throwing it on my bag. Whatever. I get off the bus and my mom's there to pick me up. I was just so irritated from the incident not to mention I was cold and tired. I was just in my world that when I got in our car, my Mom asked what was wrong. I told her the whole story. She told me I should've stood up from myself even though I threw the entire cup of ice at them.
I get home and decide to shower just to relax. I go to bed over it and dreading that they would say something about it. You never know with those girls, sometimes they make a big deal over things and other times they don't.
I decided to not sit with them in the cafeteria the next morning. (Because at our school, the Junior High has to be in the cafeteria in the mornings so we don't go around roaming the school.) Nothing really happened during 1st period because we aren't really allowed to talk in there plus the teacher is kinda not a morning person. 2nd period comes around and I have to sit literally around them. Mackenzie next to me, Barbara behind her, and then Shelby ( which I knew Mackenzie had told her because they were "best friends") behind me. I'm doing my work not really paying attention when I hear "Ice Queen." I thought that they were just playing and just teasing but I tried to ignore them anyway. Then once we finished turning in our work and it's time to go, we hang out and talk. So I guess I was near Barbara while I was looking at a poster when Mackenzie says, " Barbie don't get near her she'll throw ice at you!" Tell me why she had to say that really loud and all cocky? (Again this all adds up even though it may not seem to. It starts off small and eventually gets bigger.)
I can't remember every little detail but I do remember some things. The Super Bowl was going on at that time. In our History class the teacher always has us pick teams and stuff like that (cause he's a Coach and all that) I went for The Eagles 1.) because if the Patriots won 2 years in a row when they have been RUMORED to cheat then I find that a little suspicious 2.) yeah I kinda wanted to have a little competition with Mackenzie mainly 3.) I'm not into sports so I just went with them. In science I hear Mackenzie say across the room, "Yeah Priscila only went for the Eagles because she wants to go against me. And you know how you have to stay home from school for 24 hours when you're sick? She doesn't even do that she just comes to school like that getting everybody sick." Okay 1.) I go to school when I'm sick because my Mom makes me. I'm not one of those kids who boss their parents around. My mom is MEXICAN and she'll beat my ass if I dare to boss her around. So yeah and I have gotten sick from somebody at school. 2.) She misses the WHOLE day of school to get her braces tightened!! She'll leave school or not go for the littlest reasons. So.....
I eventually went and hung my around these to girls (at separate times because one Leslie can't stand Kara the other girl.) They either have been put aside and don't really talk to the girls in my class. So I went with them. I have know them since kindergarten because we go to a 1A school. Plus I hadn't really talked to them in ages. They have been so good to me and I wouldn't go back to my other "friends" . So they helped me get through the situation. My bsf had moved that summer so I couldn't really go to her. She did help me soooooo much because I told her everything!!! And not to mention her cousin Ethan. He helped as well. I'll get to that later on.
One day, Leslie and I were finding seats to eat lunch. Each grade has an assigned table. We had a long table and you can sit on either side. For some reason Leslie was going to sit in front of Mackenzie and Shelby so I told her, "Nooo not there! Let's go over here." Then Mackenzie says, "Ew. Get away from us." 🤨🤨🤨 And I guess you would be wondering ( like if anyone is going to read this) "What's up with Mackenzie? Why do you mention her name so much?" Well Mackenzie was one of my best friends. And me and her used to hang out all the time. She and I used to talk about everything and I kinda distanced myself from my ACTUAL BSF Celeste when she was still at this school. Which I deeply regret and blame myself for every day. So this hurt a lot more because she was like my best friend at school now that Celeste had moved.
I remember one day, we were in Science and I had accidentally left my jacket in her class. I go in the Coach's room and ask about it. She told me that Jordan (a guy in my class) had taken it for me. So I go to my Prime Time class ( it's like free time for Junior and High School while the Elementary has lunch). My class all had the same classroom and when I go to look for it I FIND IT IN THE DAMN TRASH CAN!!! Jordan is one of the nicest kids in my class so I KNEW FOR A FACT he didn't do it. No questions asked it was Mackenzie. Boiiii (yes I know that's not how you spell it but in this scenario that's how I'm going to spell it.) I was mad but didn't want to show it cause that makes you vulnerable.
That week we had a another basketball game on Thursday and a tournament on Saturday. I begged my Mom to let my sister in law pick me up or something. My sister in law lives not that far from where we were going to play and she was always down to go. My mom said to ask and sure enough she said yes. I didn't want to ride the bus home because I was extremely afraid and scared that they would do something bad and bigger to me. On the ride to the game, I sat alone. At one point I shed a few tears because I felt bad that my sister in law had to come to get my ass when she probably had other things to do. Plus I was so scared that things would worsen. Why? I don't know. I just got paranoid and I just left it. I quickly thought of something else and listened to my music. I'm an ugly crier so you can DEFINITELY tell when I'm crying.
The game starts. (I'm pretty sure we lost. I can't really remember .) I get my things once the game ends and I tell my sister in law if she can wait because I needed to find the coach and tell her that I was leaving with my sister in law. We stopped at DQ (the only place you can eat really when you are in that town) and we had a good time. I come home happy, jumping off the walls like if nothing bad or sad was happening.
The next day was Friday, and I woke up shaking and trembling. I told me mom and she asked what was wrong. I knew that I was afraid they (the Mean Girls) were definitely going to do something the next day at the tournament. I managed to calm down somehow. Everything went okay that day until 6th period. 5th period was Technically class and I was literally at the same table as the Mean Girls. I was the first to walk out of the class when the bell rang. I was walking down the hallway, kinda sad because Mackenzie kept whispering into Shelby's ear and you know what that means. I heard them laughing and saying Ice Queen and a bunch of other things. My heart couldn't take it anymore and I cried. IN THE HALLWAY WITH PEOPLE IN EVERY CORNER!!!! 6th period was Band. I play the flute and so did Barbara. Next to her was Mackenzie and Shelby and they play the Clarinet. Kara knew I was crying and was speaking too loudly because I had told her that I was going to tell the principal because I genuinely couldn't take it. And she was like telling me what I should say even though I had it all planned. The worst part is, our band director really loves to call people out. So if he saw me crying, he would say why in front of my bully.
There's one more thing I haven't told you. I was sick a few weeks before all this so I had some painkillers in my bag. I thought, throughout all this, about taking the whole bottle in the bathroom and wait until they found my unconscious body. I thought maybe then things would stop. But I also thought, "If I die, they'll still talk. If I don't they'll still talk. I'm sorry mom and dad. I know this while hurt you. But it's better taking care of one child than two; it's less money to spend and less worrying." I wanted to start over. Rethink about my choices for who I wanted to be my friends. I wanted to take back every hurtful word I ever said to my parents. But I knew life doesn't work that way. I begged my parents to let me move schools. Shit, my sister in law offered to let me stay with her and my brother so I could go to a different school. (I live in a small town and we only have 1 school. The near by cities are not the best whatsoever and really don't appeal to me.)
That day when my Mom asked what the Mean Girls did, I told her about how they made me cry. Later that night, my mom was watching a documentary of a 13 year old girl who hung herself because of cyber bullying. My mom was telling me to never do that. She's not like a super duper religious person but she does have quite a bit of knowledge of God and the Bible. Which in my saved my life. She asked me if I had ever thought about suicide. It hurt to tell her, "Yes." I told her that I didn't want to hang myself but overdose. She asked why? I told her everything. We eventually cried together because it would break me to know I caused my mom great emotional pain. I was her first child. (I have 2 half brothers and 1 half sister. I've known them all my life so I just call them my brothers and sisters. I also have a little sister and she's my full sister.) We cried for a long time. I eventually told her that I didn't want to go to that tournament. She said she would go that next morning and tell the Coach that I wouldn't be participating in the tournament.

Part 2 coming soon...