“Five minutes...” Said some crew guy. I start off the show, spinning the wheel for someone’s match, and then Phil comes out to the ring and basically snaps. Then we have a few matches. Cena cuts a promo; gets attacked by the shield, and then Dwayne has his stupid victory celebration which Phil interrupts. The show ends with Paul heyman’s performance evaluation. I do not know the outcome of that. Something big must be happening. A cameraman comes in and I get into position. “Five...four...three...two..one.”
“Good evening Las Vegas. Tonight is Raw roulette, where every match will have a stipulation or an interesting competition; like dancing or karaoke. So let’s get started.” I span the wheel of stipulations. It landed on the No disqualification match.
“Well, it looks like we are going to have a no disqualification match between … the united states champion Antonio Cesaro and .. Randy Orton.” The crowd is going crazy. The camera went off. I heard Phil’s music hit and a chorus of cheers and boos can be heard. I wanted to watch this so I sat on my couch and enjoyed every minute of it. He had a huge tantrum, but he was really good at it. We went to commercial.
After a long boring advertisement about life insurance we were back on. The no DQ match was up. While that was on I did the rest of my little segments, they weren’t going to air it until later.
The one that made me laugh was when the wheel landed on the lingerie pillow fight, for Tensai and Brodus Clay. Tensai left before I re-span the wheel. It landed on dance competition. Thank god! After doing the segments I enjoyed the rest of the show.
Dwayne came out and did his lame shtick, saying he ended Phil’s dreadful days as champion and stating that he did it for the ‘people’. Bitch please you did it for the money. Finally Phil came out and man, he was unintentionally funny. Dwayne does his usual you don’t have nuts speech, he always goes there.
He must be secretly gay. He told Phil to come down to the ring and called him a punk ass bitch. Phil acknowledged the ‘punk ass bitch’ insult and said: “I’ll stay up here and be a punk ass bitch, because it’s cool to swear ladies and gentlemen.” I laughed. When it comes to promos, he is by far the best.
After their segment ended I continued watching everything else and finally Heyman’s job evaluation is on. I eagerly watched as Paul cut one of his best promos I have ever seen. Apparently heyman and Phil are behind The Shield and Brad Maddox. Heyman tries to deny it but Vince cuts him off and was about to fire him until… Brock fucking Lesnar came out and F-5’d Vince. I was shocked, but amazed for some reason. The show ends with Vince being stretchered out of the arena. Overall, it was a great show. I and the WWE universe enjoyed it.
