Love Only

Chapter Five

Vanessa's POV

I turned back to see if Grayson was chasing after me, but I couldn't see him through the crowd. So I kept moving and once again found myself dodging into the bathroom to avoid getting in trouble. No one was in sight but I didn't want to take chances, so I went into a stall and locked the door.

I calm my breathing and feel something prick my finger. Oh right. I was still holding the rose in my hand. I examine the beautiful flower in front of me and stare at the soft petals. A flower that's so beautiful yet when you get to close it can hurt you. A perfect representation of Grayson. It didn't make sense. How could someone so sweet and thoughtful become so harsh? How could I have kissed him after his cruel words?

Footsteps echo and I hear Roni call my name. "Nessa? We know you're in here. Open up, it's just me and Hannah. Everyone else is in class already." I take a deep breath and open the stall door.

"Hey," I say. They look at me confused, and I feel the same. I have no idea what's happening. I stare into Hannah's sympathetic blue eyes. Tears start welling up and I can't stop myself from crying.

"Oh, honey," Hannah says, and she pulls me in for a hug. I weep into her shoulder, ignoring her blonde locks falling onto my face. Hannah, Roni, and I have been friends for years. When I pull away, Hannah smiles at me lovingly. With her pale skin and hourglass figure, she bares no resemblance to me and Roni. Even so, she's basically a sister to us. I couldn't imagine life without her.

"Talk to us. What's going on with you two, but more importantly, you? What even happened in the hallway?" Roni rambles through her questions.

"I honestly don't know, either. We were fighting and it just kind of happened. Obviously, I've liked Grayson for a long time, but apparently it was obvious to him too. He knew that I liked him. He's just doing this to mess with me, there's no way he likes me."

"Well he did kiss you first," Hannah interjects.

"How would you know that?" I ask. How much did everyone see?

"Well everyone was watching, starting from the minute your voices raised. You guys have been the talk of the town the last few days, so of course everyone was ready to watch a fight unfold."

"God, everyone?"

"Yep," Roni says. "It sure seemed like it. And those who didn't see will know soon. You saw the crowd around you. Everyone we know plus dozens more, including..."

"Including who?" Who could be that big of a deal?

"Including Aaron," Roni finishes. Oh god. Aaron. Anxiety fills my mind. I didn't think this situation could get any worse.

"Yeah, he didn't seem too happy," Hannah says.

"Well why would he even care? We ended on such bad terms, and he hasn't spoken to me since the breakup."

"C'mon Nessa, you can't be so oblivious. He's still so in love with you." Hannah gives a pitiful look.

"I guess I hadn't noticed. All he does is avoid me." Aaron and I were on and off for almost a year. At points it didn't even feel like a real relationship. We had been really close friends before we got together, and I had been too scared to call it completely off for a long time because I didn't want to ruin the friendship. So we stayed weirdly dating until I finally had enough. He didn't take it very well, I almost felt afraid of him.

We stay silent for a minute. "So," Hannah finally says. "Now what?"

"Now, we go to class."

•••
I sulk into the math classroom, Hannah infront of me almost like a guard for any of the stares. But that only goes so far until we have to take our own seats side-by-side in the middle of the classroom. I use to hate the front, but right now I would've given anything to go there to avoid being surrounded by the curious onlookers.

The moment Mr.Stenson starts to talk, it turns to background noise. I pretend to be taking thoroughly notes, but in reality I was trying to understand the events that had unfolded only hours ago. It was as if Hannah could sense my agitation because she passed over a folded sheet of paper containing her worry.

I unfolded the creased page and read the concerned words written hastily. Hey, how are you doing? A little heart follows the sentiment. I didn't want to worry her but I couldn't hold back my sarcasm. Well, what do you think? I nearly slam the paper down onto her desk but the fear of the teacher taking it was to great to make a scene.

I see her bite her pen in a nervous manner before lowering her eyes to write her response. Five minutes later I receive her reply.  I assume not great. I mean one minute you were screaming and the next you were kissing. What happened? I rack mind for the right way to respond while absentmindedly doodling on the page. I finally give up and just write my confusion onto the page. Hannah, I seriously don't know. You know that I have liked him for a long time now, but he's changed since 10th grade. I clumsily return the paper back to its sender and wait for a retort.

A couple minutes later Hannah sneaks the paper on top of my notebook along with her thoughtful thinking. I mean, I can kind of understand. Divorce is rough on kids. But then, Ethan is still a nice guy. There's gotta be something else going on. I ponder her words and even though she may be right, there's still some things I don't understand. Yeah,  I'm just so confused. What really bugs me is that HE was the one who kissed me. Why?? I slide it back to her, and eventually I get her feedback.

He likes you. He may be an ass, but he does like you. So that's brings up the question of what are you going to do? Did the kiss mean anything? Of course it did. For both of us, right? I answer her question on the paper as honestly as I can. Well, to me it did. I really like him. Hannah, I really do. I just don't know if he feels the same. I give it back to her. Class time is running out but I need her final opinion on what to do. He might be more trouble than he's worth... He might just be scared of hurting his rep, as stupid as that is. His friends are so controlling. Whatever you decide, I'll back you, Nessa, just follow your heart.