Everyone always tries to be loved by someone. It doesn't matter if we feel okay with that, we just need to feel loved by someone. When we finally feel like someone actually loves us, we forget about all the troubles. But what if we can see and understand the love people feel towards you but we still feel loneliness after a while? We drive those people away, in hopes of a better love for them and us that never comes.
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"You know that I love you, right?" The same question every time, never changing and the answer stays the same. "Yeah, I love you too."
It all started with an innocent flirt by dorm kitchen. After that, there were dates, kisses, and confessions but soon it became a routine for both of them. No more exciting adventures and secret kisses when no one watches. Now we rarely see each other because we have other friends and homework that is due. We even stopped texting regularly. No more "sweet dreams" texts before going to sleep and "good morning" when we just opened our eyes. Maybe it's normal to be like this after a while but I can't keep up this facade for him. I don't want to see him hurt because of my actions. I don't want him to waste his time and effort on me anymore. I will set him free and maybe, just maybe I will find someone who I will love as he loves me.
"Let's stop this." I looked into Yoongi's eyes and almost took those words back. His eyes were full of hurt and it tore me inside. I bit my tongue just not to hurt him even more. I still loved him but it wasn't the same love as before.
"Why?"
"I'm tired of us and our relationship. It just doesn't feel right anymore." I quietly said and stood up. I couldn't keep doing this. But if I won't do this, the love would kill him too.
We broke up. We went our own paths that didn't cross each other in any obvious way. Maybe it was the wrong choice but after a while, he started to smile again. How did I know? I watched from afar. I couldn't find a person to love as much as I loved him but at least he was free to love again. But he didn't love anyone anymore. He just kept smiling whenever I saw a glimpse of him. But even the knowledge that he was smiling like before we met, made my heart e at ease. He was saved.
"You know that I still love you." His voice whispered behind me. Startled I looked and there he was. The old Yoongi, that I fell in love with. He was smiling the same smile and looked so happy.
"I know, I love you too."
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