Since day one I felt attracted to you in a strong feeling way
Unable to explain why or how all I could think was think of was wow
I Still remember the first time I talked to you, all I thought was now I look lame
Tried making you laugh, not even a ha or haha
Didn't expect the conversation to last long but still I wanted to keep trying
An finally we had a full conversation an you left me with fascination
The more we talked that closer we got an soon you were all of my thoughts
I fell for you as you fell for me you became my best friend
But soon then after it became more than just that but I know for a fact
You won't ever be able to be replaceable leaving is impossible nothing stopped us
Had nothing to hide, you were my thing to pride and what filled me with joy
Every waking day I tell you good morning, and at every day grows to a late end I send you a goodnight text
All time we'd talk on the phone for hours got along so well not a fight
I got so used to you and how close we were I thought it'd go forever
But it never crossed my mind that you may not always end up being mine
You'd ask and I play it as if I seem fine and happy for you but I became distant
I didn't always wish to listen but I did but soon I started to have seem hid from you
Truth be told I failed to ask you to be mine an then the whole time I felt so hurt an filled with guilt my mind had these thoughts built
But still after our chat I realized you were right, I made a promise to always be there
Soon after we slowly started to go back to being best friends till the end
But then tragedy for you overwhelmed and sad for you had your heart ripped out apart
Soon after you just started to fall, i tried so hard to keep you from hitting the ground
Did the best i could to hear the sound of your laughter soon after your smile started to shine once more
Even though the light was not for me i just couldn't so i cut what at first sought to be a loss
Was only showing my blindness an just seeking to hide this pain by moving on
But it only aided to you soon being gone forever
Turned out I was, wrong all along about our whole fallout
I learned I truly can't be happy without you in other words after choosing wrong I became lost without you
For months I thought of you and us an going back to how thing were
At least that's what i could hope for but nope perhaps I would be best in past as a blur
Now you're gone, will you ever come back I may never know
But if this were to show in front of you an I have one more time to let you know what I feel and think
Understand that I hold strong but deep down it's all an illusion
Deep down I'm drowning in pain confusion from not having you
You are all that I wish to have gain back but I think chances stacked at never again
So if it is goodbye…. I am sorry
So I leave you with one final poem.
.
..
…
….
Thought you were forever lost
It hurt like hell
To cut my loss and move on
As I did I found out
that choice was wrong
In a quick turnaround
I had lost twice
I asked my myself
how was I to till
That this would be the outcome
Months, later
finally pulled together
I thought this pain
was done an gone
An then I saw you…..
A thousand memories
Pour in with the emotion
I find this pain has once again
Gained access into my mind
I still won't deny
I still feel the same
As our first day close together came
Deep love, like I never felt
Heart skips beats
Could only imagine flatline peeps
If we were to meet
She was Tha Goddess of Insanity
As I was her psycho Clown Prince
Together we were better
Than bonnie & Clyde
But now that's gone
As once again
Your beauty hides
I lay here and cry
Wishing and begging
That I get another try
I loved you before
I loved you during
I love you after
I'd give anything
For just one more try
I promise to never leave you hurt
Never again, I still victimize
My own self an I tell myself
I'll be forever unforgiven
That for you
Me gone is good riddance
I know I'm an idiot for this
All I can say now is
Sorry for it all
I made you fall
I'm sorry
I wasn't there to catch you
I'm sorry you grew so attached
I'm sorry
Even if you don't want me back
