A/N Hey everyone! This chapter has some very sensitive material in it, but it needs to happen for the story. If you're easily triggered by topics like abortions or failed pregnancies, etc, please PLEASE do not put yourself in danger! I promise it'll be briefly talked about when you need to know for sure what happened. Be safe!
"I can't believe we're home," Robert sighed. "Finally."
We'd done our honeymoon, had fun in Europe, taken lots of pictures, but now we had to return to our normal life in Chicago. "That was fun," I nodded, "but I can't wait to sleep in our bed."
"Amen," he sighed. "Hey," he put a hand on my shoulder after a moment, "you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm just feeling a little sick," I shrugged. "Maybe I ignored my homesickness and now its caught up to me."
"You don't think you're..." he trailed off as I collapsed onto our couch.
"I don't see why I would be," I shrugged. "I mean, we've been safe every time, right?"
"Yeah, yeah," he nodded and now looked like he was about to throw up. "But—but what if it failed? What if the condom broke a little and we didn't notice?"
"Hey," I said calmly and walked over to him, taking ahold of his hands comfortingly. "We have options, you know."
"Like what?"
"Well, I know a girl who had gone to get—"
"You're not doing that."
"Robert, we just got married I don't know if we can handle a child."
"You're not! That's so dangerous and I'm not losing you!"
"I've survived a fucking war and a concentration camp, I don't think a medical procedure will kill me."
"You don't know that."
"I'm not willing to take that chance!"
"Robert, listen to me," I said and put my hands on either side of his face. He let out a quiet sigh and put his hands over mine. For the first time in this discussion, I saw the legitimate fear in his eyes. "I didn't say I was getting it. I said it was something to consider." He nodded and looked down. "The other option is: we can wait and see. For all we know, I'm just sick. I mean, we just got back from Europe."
"Yeah," he nervously smiled. "Yeah! I mean, we shouldn't overthink it quite yet, right?"
"Right!"
"Okay, okay. But as soon as you feel like you know, please tell me."
I nodded, "I promise."
I knew, though, and I knew that the likelihood of it ending well was not very good. I don't know how I knew either of those things, but I could just feel it.
I felt sick almost every day after that in the afternoon for the next week. I'd also found myself resting my hands on my belly more often than I'd like to admit. I'd also gained weight in that same time period. To say the least, I was screwed. My options were: to have the baby, to go find somewhere to have a sketchy abortion, or to wait it out and see if my instincts are right that something will go wrong.
