Hi, my name is Raeshawn, I believe in the lord, because the Lord has worked his miracle's on me. You see I was never a person of strong faith, I mean I knew about God and I have always tried to live by a Christian Lifestyle. I am after all from a Christian family, it's even more ridiculous though, that I am Jamaican and I was never a good Christian. You see in Jamaica, Christians dominates faith wise, God is found everywhere in my home country, yet I was never a good Christian, but then again I never realised the relevance of God.
Until, December (2013). I was sitting on my bed and have been thinking about all the things that I've gone through and was thinking about it again, the thoughts, the thought of killing my self. My father was always gone and it was just me, there was no one there to stop me from doing it! I decided that I was going to do it, end my life. So, I went into the kitchen and picked up my knife, I then went into my room and wrote a long letter detailing why I am doing it, and the people I love the most. That's when I saw it, my bible of two years, I've never even cracked it open. I decided that I was going to crack it open. The first thing it led me to was Psalm 23. Psalm 23, do you know how many times I've recited that verse? But it never meant anything to me then. I read it, and it clicked:
23The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. 3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.
That verse saved my life, it is with that verse that I found my peace.
Believe me when I say, it's a struggle being a 16 year old who wants to be normal, but also wants to live the way God intended for me. I am not preaching to you, because I myself am trying to get by trying not to sin. I wrote down my expeirience with God and thought that, maybe someone has the same struggle as me and wants to know they are not alone!
The only advice I can give you: MY GOD IS FORGIVING, HEALING, WONDERFUL, AWESOME, BEAUTIFUL, GRACEFUL & LOYAL GOD!!!!!!!!
