The Alpha's Academy

CHAPTER 6: What Am I Gonna Do??

ZANE

For a brief moment in the beginning of her ranting, I admired her courage and confidence. However, after she mentioned the whole me not having a Luna thing, that's when I lost it. 

"Fuck you! You don't know shit about me. All you know is what you've heard and I may be ruthless and an asshole but that's what being an Alpha means. And as far as me not having a Luna, which is none of your damn business anyways, I have my reasons. However you on the other hand, I can definitely see why you're mate less. Look at you! Who in their right mind would want someone that looks like you and that disrespects an Alpha?!" I snap back at her. "I can have any girl I want! " I tell her. 

I don't care if my wolf is mad at me and is cursing me out right now. I will NOT be disrespected by anyone. 

What's making me more pissed off right now though is that I can begin to see the regret she has in her eyes for saying what she did about me not having a Luna which is now making me to start feeling guilty as I begin noticing tears begin to appear in her eyes. 

I try to take a step closer towards her but she backs up and then quickly makes her way up the stairs and heads into her room as I hear her door slam shut. 

"What the fuck Zane?!" I wince at the screaming of my sister yelling at me from behind. 

I turn around and look at her. 

"I don't want to hear it." I start to tell her. 

"Doesn't matter, cause your dumb stubborn ass is gonna hear it anyways. What the hell has happened to you? You've changed so much in the past couple of years to the point where I don't even recognize you." She begins. "At least not since..." She starts to say but I cut her off. 

"Don't." I warn her. 

"Don't what? You really need to move on from that day when mom was killed and to stop blaming yourself, it wasn't your fault. You aren't the monster you think you are and I don't want you to become one either." She says while getting a little choked up. 

"I can't move on from it. And she doesn't need to be here." I reply while pointing upstairs towards Midnight's room. 

"Well she's staying rather you like it or not. I don't know what's been going on with you lately but, you really need to change something." She says before walking past me and off towards the backyard. 

I'm more frustrated than I've been in a long time. Stella was real young when our mother was killed, too young to remember anything. She's just going off what our dad told her. She has no idea either that that's only half of why I'm more short tempered. She herself has no idea what all you have to go through to become an Alpha King. Maybe I am becoming an asshole but I need to be this way. To be as great as our father one day, I need to be more like him. 

I think right now I need to go somewhere to cool down. So I leave out the front door to avoid seeing Stella or anyone else at the moment. 

I had stormed out of the house and ran off into the woods across the ways and went to my favorite spot that nobody knows about. 

I love it here with there always being a nice breeze, the sound of waves crashing several hundred feet down below the cliff against the rocks. It's a place where I have always been able to come to to calm down and clear my head. 

"You better be thinking of ways to fix this." My wolf said to me. 

"I told you to drop it. I'm not in the mood to hear your shit." I tell him. 

"Hello Zane." I heard a gentle sweet and familiar female voice coming from behind me.

I stood up and turned to see the Moon Goddess. 

She had long white curly hair that cascaded down past her lower back while wearing a long lavender colored flowing dress She had a light blue glow surrounding her that made her look radiant 

"You. How could you give me a mate? I thought we made a deal?!" I reminded her. 

"No. You made a suggestion that I not give you a mate because you felt unworthy of one. However, I saw different. And you shouldn't be so quick to judge her neither in what she's been through. She's gone through her own hell from her own family. You both have walls, bruises and scars. That doesn't make either one of you unworthy of love. You deserve to be happy and loved." She begins to tell me. 

"No, I don't." I replied with my head looking down at the ground in shame. "I couldn't protect my mother. I was too weak. So what if I can't protect my Luna?" I tell her. 

"You must stop looking in the past because you can't go back or change anything. What you can do is focus on the future, now that you can do something about." She says. 

"What if I fail again? What if something happens to her or my family and I wasn't able to stop it again? What then?" I asked her feeling choked up a little bit. 

"You need to understand that you are not the only one that is suffering. But you are the only one who blames yourself for what happened when nobody else feels that way, not even your father. We mustn't let fear determine our future. Besides, pain is temporary. You deserve happiness and both you and Midnight belong together. " She finishes telling me before disappearing. 

Maybe she's right. Then again, maybe she's not. I'm not sure I am capable of loving somebody like a mate should.  What am I gonna do?

Next chapter will be posted soon! :)