Remedy of a broken heart

Chapter 1

Why is life so hard? Each day i wake up feeling like shit not wanting to get out of bed. Life can be so unfair i think as i stare at the ceiling in deep thought.

I get up and check my phone to see if i have any missed calls. "Well looks like he's not going be calling anytime soon." i say to myself referring to my ex boyfriend Charlie.

I sit on the side of my bed bitting my lip debating on if i even want to get up. All i want is to sleep my problems away that's one of my toxic traits. I wish that someone would notice me sinking like a boat. I can't stay floating because my boat is always targeted. The only person i want to notice me doesn't want anything to do with me i hurt him but that's another story.

My alarm goes off and gets me out of my thoughts.

"Shit, it's 6:30am already. This man still hasn't called." I finally get up off my bed and walk to the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror.

"Ugly aren't you." i say to myself knocking my confidence down even more. I turn the sink on and splash warm water on my face to wake myself up. I start my morning routine off by doing that as well as brushing my teeth.

I stare at myself in the mirror more looking deep into my dark brown eyes.

"I see you." I whisper to myself as a warm tear falls on the side of my face. I wipe it with my hand and open the bathroom door.

I walk down the hall and make a left to wake to my two youngest sisters room. I bang on the door and yell "Aye, wake up y'all time for school."

Every morning i wake up just to get them situated and take them to school. My mother can't she gets up and goes to work early every morning. She's a single mom and has other things to do. So if i don't do it who else will.

I walk to my room and close the door,as i hear my sisters running into the hallway towards the bathroom. Walking towards my closet i look for something to put on. I hear my phone ringing and i run and take it off the charger it's him my ex Charlie. My heart beats so fast and joy and excitement rushes throw my body.

I answer the phone trying not to sound so happy just normal.

"Hello?"I answered with a small smile.

"What's up?" he said in a calm voice. I love his voice so much it's deep with so much base. Every time i hear his voice joy runs through my soul.

"Nothing much, just getting myself together. What about you?" I said questioning him. I already knew what he was doing every morning this early he's on his way to work. Every morning he calls me just to talk to me before work. He used to call me after when he was on his way home but that was when we were together and in love.

"On my way to work duh." he says with a small laugh. I start to smile and say "Obviously smart ass, i wasn't expecting you to call me this morning you don't anymore hardly." I say bitting my lip wondering what he might say.

I fear questioning him or even being too pushy i'm not his girlfriend anyway, i can't expect the treatment i was used to. I just missed him so much we hardly talk it's my fault anyway after what i had done to him but like i said that's another story.

"Look Femi, you know why things are like this. And sometimes i'm busy or i just want to be to myself." He said his tone of voice got serious. I sat there and was silent playing but my fingers lost in my thoughts.

"If you're going to be quite get off the phone. I didn't call you to sit in silence." He said with a attitude.

I was shocked and felt this feeling come over me. I really lost him all because of my stupid decision. "Okay, sorry i really wanted to talk but i have to get dressed anyway." I said trying not to cry.