The Drunk History Of Fall Out Boy Script (Clean Version)

Drunk History of FOB

*centuries* While on the Save Rock and Roll tour... Brendon Urie from Panic! At the Disco drank
Shots of COLDCOCK Whiskey
Shots of Jameson
Shots of Genlivet Scotch
Numerous Beers throughout the day
Numerous Beers chugged before the shots
and a Vodka Redbull from Joe Troham
And then retold the history of Fall Out Boy..
Alright, It’s summer of 2001 Joe meets Patrick and he’s like “Yo, I know about music.”
And Patrick’s like “Yo, I know more about music.”
"That’s impossible! Do you wanna start a band?”
And Patrick’s like, “…Yeah… That’s cool.”
And then he’s like “Yo, this is a book store, it's not a music store!”

And then they met at Patrick’s house. So Patrick’s wearing shorts and socks and a hat. Patrick is playin’ drums for some freakin’ reason!And Pete’s there for some reason! They start playin’ music together. And they're like “Oh, let’s play some freakin’ covers from some other bands!” It was like, Green Day and freakin’ Misfits and freakin’ Ramones!
Pete said to Joe, “Yo, we gotta change this stuff up!  Yo, we’ve played all these bands; let’s play stuff from Fall Out Boy.”
And so Pete and Patrick are like “Yo, that’s dope. But we need a freakin’ drummer!” Because Patrick’s playin’ drums and he’s a singer!
Patrick's like “Yo! I got a soul voice!”
And they're like “Wait, how do you have a soul voice?”
And he’s like “Yo, watch this: Yeah!”
And they’re like “Oh my god! That sounds like soul!” So they put it in the song and it was like "WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIGHT!”
And then they’re like: “Yo, that's freakin’ perfect. This is Fall Out Boy.” And they made records like, Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it.
[Pete corrects Brendon]
It's called Evening Out With Your Girlfriend.

[Brendon ignores Pete]
With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It's called Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend!
It's called Eating Out Your Girlfriend, and it's real and it doesn't matter.

And Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he was like “Yo, what the FRICK! Yo, this is gonna be freakin’ DOPE!”
So they made a record, and it was called: Take This To Your Grave.
They made it without a drummer! And they had like three, four drummers come in.
The four drummers they had come in were like: Josh Freese, Neil Peart, the dude from Toto…The fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something.
And they were like, “Yo, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take This To Your Grave. Freakin' record it.” And he did it, and he killed it.
He was like, Bigadigadigalalululapssshhhh!
Killing the skins! Tapping the skins! Tapping the rims! Playing the stuff! Killing these bishes! Wrapping it out!

[Brendon to Pete]
(You're getting a freaking tattoo right now! What the freak is going on?!)

“We should get signed, to Fueled by Ramen. 'Cause these guys know what the freak is going on.”
And they were like “Yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not freakin' hard , we will sign you guys."
Pete was like ”Yo! We got this record that’s freakin’ dope, dude! It's called Take This To Your Grave.“
Hey, it's gonna be called From Under The Cork Tree, it's gonna be freakin' huge.
And then Patrick’s like "I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic. These are three songs that are gonna make the album and it's called, this is called: Thnks fr th Mmrs, 20 Dollar Nose Bleed, and Sugar We're Goin Down.
And they made this record that was freaking dope and it freaking hit on the charts.
Like: one, two, three! Three, two one! Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! TEN TO ONE!
From Under The Cork Tree sold like, four million records!
Ten million records!
Fifteen million records!
And Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. And Patrick was like  "That's good!”
Pete was like “Yo, freak you! I can do whatever I want!”
Joe was like “Yeah, it's cool man, whatever… I don’t give a crap.” And then Andy was like “Eh… Cool!”
And Pete was like "Makeup is freakin’ great for a guy. Because it makes a guy look beautiful. Which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. And I wanna change that. I wanna make sure everybody thinks that guys are beautiful."

(-I'm good so far.
-You wanna spit one more time?
-Yeah, I do.
...Shut the frick!..)
oh frick" alright, alright.
Pete was like “Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed about this 🍆 pic!”
And then I saw the pic, and I was like “Eh, it's not bad. It's not a bad 🍆. Let’s be real.”
We made Rolling Stone one issue before Fall Out Boy. And Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so mad!
They were like “Yo, frick you guys!”
They were like “Yo! Panic has the freaking cover of Rolling Stone? Yo, frick these dudes! We're gonna freaking go miles above! We're gonna hit every freaking continent there is known to man!”
But they didn’t! Because they missed a second of time.
Apparently, they were like: “Oh, crap we got every continent.” And they didn’t actually hit it.
Dude, Pete was like "What the FRICK?”
Oh, you didn’t freakin’ make the continent. It's like, frick you!

So From Under the Cork Tree happens, we freakin' have three, four years of awesomeness!
Like people are cumming on themselves, 'cause it's so big!
Alright
So Fall Out Boy was like, so Patrick’s like “Yo, we're gonna name this record From Under The Cork Tree and From Infinity On High.”
Pete was like “Yo, Folie à Deux means the Theatric of Two.” "oh sorry, sorry"
Fall Out Boy was like “Yo, we gotta take a break” meaning, Pete was like “Yo, we gotta take a break bro”
And Patrick’s like, “I need time for my music! Uhhh!”
And Joe's like “Yo, I need time to find the freakin’ art dude I gotta find some frickin’ meau-metal.”
And Andy’s like “I’m just gonna play with some frickin' metal bands.”

And they were like, “Alright, this breaks been like three years long. Two years long.
Three years long.
Three and a half?
We gotta freakin’ come back man. We gotta come back strong!

(-You took my beer away, what the frick?! "
drinks water*
-No, you poured it all over yourself!
-Yeah, you poured it on yourself, man.)

We gotta make this crap legit. It's gonna be freakin' dope. It's gonna go frickin' sky high. We're gonna make a freakin' record that sails the skies.
We're gonna call this record: Save Rock and Roll.
So they made "Alone Together", "Light 'Em Up", "Alone Together", "Phoenix".
And everyone’s like “What the frick? You’re working with this guy who freakin' recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk!”

(-What the frick is this on my shirt, did I puke on my shirt?
-No, you poured beer all over yourself.
-Oh god...)

Pete was like: “Yo, we're gonna end up on the tour with Panic! At The Disco and Twenty Pilots.”

And that’s all. And that’s all that matters. And that is how the freaking   story goes.
*centuries*
Story Told By Brendon Urie of Panic At The Disco. Filmed, Directed,and Edited by Jack " the camera guy" edinger. starring Fall Out Boy. script supervisor Pete Wentz. music ny ryan luciani
American Buthy/   featuring centuries availible world wide jan 20. preorder on falloutboy.com
www.falloutboy.com