Sink or Swim
It’s as if I was here in the physical state, but I actually wasn't. My own heart beat as slow as the tick of the clock when you choose to stare at it with full concentration, and it suddenly stops. I could feel the anxiety burning and simmering in the very pit of my stomach, until that stopped as well. Then everything around me turned into a blur and the world leaving me behind. My head was too heavy for me to hold and I barely was able to feel it fall to my chest, my eyes sealing themselves shut. How had it all gotten this bad, this abruptly? I assumed I’m getting quite far ahead of myself here. This whole scenario wouldn't make sense if I started off from right this very moment. I know that for a fact that this is only the most important and suspenseful part of this story so I cannot possibly begin with it. Presumably, it would be best if I started from the very beginning; not from my birth, but the beginning of this rather queer tale; November Eleventh.
Oddly enough, I remember the morning of this event pretty distinctly. Truthfully, I remember many things that would be outrageous for others to remember. That’s simply one of the reasons why I have always felt out of place. Nobody noticed that I was different from what I could tell. In fact, I believe that they believe I am one of them. Well, if we are going into specific detail, I am probably one of the most popular kids at our school. It despises me to bring up cliques and popularity because it’s so stereotypical but I can’t deny it. I am co-captain of the school soccer team and I have always been well liked. My mom calls it my charm and romantic gene but I think she’s just trying to toot her own horn. I really am not an outgoing person for that matter, or a very confident one truthfully, but I am simply stating the obvious; that I have more friends than anyone else and I am more liked around school. My not-so-simple theory doesn’t have to make sense because it just works. But this was a different story and different life. My old and better life was back in my home of Dublin before my father decided to kick my mom and my brother, Skye, and I out of the house. He told me that if I ever wanted to come home he would let me, but I didn’t hear him tell that to Skye or mom so I knew it would be best not to come back. Maybe someday when it wouldn’t hurt mom as bad. It’s not like I wanted to pick sides, they are my parents, but dad kind of brought this on himself, kicking mom out of the house and all. He didn’t seem to give me much of a choice, but then again he had said I was allowed to return.Yet, I still wanted to live with him, in his home, in my home, in my town. I didn’t want to move. I had everything set for me in Dublin and I wasn’t ready to let that go. I was actually pretty shy when it came to meeting new people. The thing about Dublin was that I knew everybody and so I had no need to be shy. It was a very small town with only a few thousand residents, so you just knew everybody. I had been a fearless young lad and I guess it built up enough to make me brave enough to let go of my mom’s hand on the first day of school and play with my friends instead. I remember seeing other kids crying or hiding behind their mom’s, but not me. This first day of school however, that’s exactly what I dreaded, and I don’t even know why that is.
The first forty-seven minutes of that hectic morning were the worst memorable parts of that day, besides the actual schoolwork. From what I recall I was quick to wake up but remained in the comfort of my bed for almost twenty minutes. After another five minutes, Skye barged into my room and, in one swift motion, removed my bed of any and all covers. Now chilly, I pulled myself into a ball and hid my face nervously in my pillow. Skye shook his head making the toothbrush in his mouth wobble. While he did this I prayed that none of his disgusting toothpaste accidentally fell on me; the last thing I needed was to be sticky on my first day at a new school. Unfortunately for me, Skye was two full years older than me and he effortlessly picked me up and flung me out of bed. I groaned as I landed on my back on the shaggy carpet, which to my dismay, mom hadn’t yet cleaned thoroughly. Skye smirked at me in reply then made his way back to our shared bathroom to spit out his toothpaste. I only stayed on the ground for about ten seconds before getting up and getting dressed. Getting dressed in the morning had to be one of the things I hated most in this world. Since I wasn’t normal, and I was me, I had to decide on the perfect outfit based on who I needed to impress. In Dublin, the people I needed to impress were clear: my mates, my teachers, and my crush. However, the only remaining thing was my teachers, and they weren’t actually my teachers. I knew that this time I had to make it perfect, so staying in bed all morning definitely hadn’t been the smartest decision. If there was one thing I understood it was how to make friends. I wasn’t an expert at keeping them but my friends weren’t the ones to ruin a friendship. I know for a fact that I am a handful, but being the compassionate people that they are, they’ve managed to stay by me all this time. I will probably never find friends like that again since these kids have had time to build those bonds and I am only just starting out. I realize that the moment I walk through the doors of the school that I will be the immediate target of personerization. I know that’s not a true word but I still use it far too often. That’s another thing about me; I am like a six year old in the way that I make up some of my own vaguely large vocabulary. The issue with that is that I use some words in which I know nothing of their definition so it just sounds like a mixed up word jumble of nonsense.
