The Childhood Nights

Chapter II

When we got into the cafeteria, I saw how packed it was, even though it was 10 o'clock at night. Axel looked around, trying to find a place for us to sit. We could only find a booth seat towards the back.

"I can't believe that she's going to be gone. I thought I would be the first to die for being an idiot all the time," Axel told me, looking away after the word 'gone'.

"Ax, I-I think she might already be gone," I replied, still hoping that I had only imagined what I had seen in her hospital room.

"Why do you think that?" Axel asked with a puzzled look. "Her parents would have told us."

"They were taking her off of the tubes and I saw a flat line on the monitor. If their daughter had just died, I don't think they would immediately just tell us. They would need their time with her to say their final goodbyes," I whispered. I wanted to get out of this cafeteria, to just wake up from this nightmare.

Axel looked away, and I could have sworn I had seen the glimmer of a tear on his cheek. I let out a small cry to be quiet in front of other people, but Axel was close enough to hear it. He moved over to my side of the booth, and wrapped his arm around me. Every time I let out a cry, Axel would give me a small squeeze. I cried into his shirt, and tried to pull away but he wouldn't let me go. I hadn't had one of these hugs in a long time, one where someone won't let go because they need you so much.

I started to feel a tiny bit like maybe a still had feelings for him, but I pushed them away because it had to just be my emotions getting the best of me.

"We should probably go let the others know, right? Or see her parents?" I asked once Axel had lessened his hold on me.

"Yeah, let's-let's go."

"Wait, can I talk to you two?" I heard from a quiet, strained voice.  I looked towards the sound and saw Julian's pale face staring at the two of us.  Axel took his arm off of me once he saw him, and I tried to explain that Axel was just comforting me but Julian cut me off before I could.

"I don't care what the two of you are right now, that's not why I'm here.  I saw Gianna, and she wasn't connected to any tubes.  She was lifeless.  She's de- she's gone.  We're never going to hear her voice again, we're never going to get the advice she always gave us ever again, and we're never going to see her smile through everything," Julian told us.  It was official, Gianna had passed.

"Did you tell everyone else?" I asked after a moment of silence.

"No, they're all still asleep.  The two of you were missing so I came here to try and find you," Julian replied.  "I also came to ask for some advice and to let something out."

"What's up, man?" Axel asked quietly.

"Actually, I wanted to just ask Hadley,"Julian said softly, looking at me.

"Oh, okay.  I'm going to just go back to the waiting room then," Axel said, with a hurt look on his face.  Axel walked out slowly.

Once we were alone, I looked at Julian sitting next to me.  I really took in what he looked like now.  His glassy chocolate eyes were the color of cherries and full of emotion.  His pecan hair was all over the place.  His pointer and middle finger endlessly tapped the table.  His shoulders were tense and nearly to his head.  His jaw was clenched and Julian seemed unfocused.

"Can you promise me that this conversation stays between us?" he asked, looking me in the eyes.

"Of course, I pinky promise," I replied, holding out my pinky to link with his. We used to always do this when we were younger. It was our thing.