Dear Mum

Dear mum,

I'm sorry I screamed I hate you when I was thirteen,

I'm sorry I always walked straight into my room coming home from school,

I'm sorry I always complained.

I'm sorry I'm not as smart and beautiful as the other kids,

I'm sorry, I never got an A in maths,

I'm sorry, I'm a depressed, worthless human being,

I'm sorry I can't be more like my sister,

I'm sorry I don't have much friends,

I'm sorry I'm antisocial,

I'm sorry I never told you I have my first kiss at fifteen,

I'm sorry that it wasn't with a boy,

I'm sorry I'm an ugly child,

I'm sorry I have so much scars on my arms

I'm sorry I never cared,

I'm sorry I never wanted to become a doctor,

I'm sorry I never figured my life out at 18,

I'm sorry I always looked so emotionless when you yelled at me,

I'm sorry I'm not like other girls,

I'm sorry the doctor diagnosed me with Major Depression and Anxiety,

I'm sorry Dad left us for a girl just two years older than me,

I'm sorry I hated him for it,

I'm sorry I was a sad wreck,

I'm sorry I will never have a child cause I'm infertile.

I'm sorry on Saturday nights, I always came back to the house drunk.

I'm sorry no one could ever love me,

I'm sorry I wasn't a good role model to my younger sister,

I'm sorry I was so consumed by anger and self hate,

I'm sorry I never liked eating Salad,

I'm sorry I didn't really know how to use my cutlery well,

I'm sorry I wasn't the perfect lady,

I'm sorry I hated all the boys you introduced me to,

I'm sorry I slapped Richard my ex future rich husband that I didn't want to marry anyways,

I'm sorry I never wore the skirts you bought me,

I'm sorry I hated Ballet,

I'm sorry I blasted the music so loud when you were around,

I'm sorry I didn't like your new husband,

I'm sorry he also left,

I'm sorry I was never there for you,

I'm sorry I was so selfish,

I'm sorry I didn't clean my room anytime you asked me to,

I'm sorry I cursed like a sailor,

I'm sorry I wanted more in life than what I already had,

I'm sorry I never dressed like a proper lady,

I'm sorry for that one time I called you a bitch,

I'm sorry I didn't want to go to prom,

I'm sorry I never smiled in pictures,

I'm sorry I never came out of my room,

I'm sorry I'd rather spend my time writing poems and reading novels than talking to you,

I'm sorry I didn't want to dye my hair blonde,

I'm sorry I dyed it purple,

I'm sorry I ran away from reform school,

I'm sorry I was so broken,

I'm sorry I chewed gum like a slut,

I'm sorry I choose to wear black lipstick instead of nude,

I'm sorry I couldn't walk in heels,

I'm sorry every time you suggested movie night I told you I wanted horror movies,

I'm sorry my favorite colour was black and not pink like most girls,

I'm sorry you were embarrassed by me,

I'm sorry I didn't want to go to the therapist,

I'm sorry I threw the pills the doctor gave me,

I'm sorry I wanted to be a dancer,

I'm sorry my career choice was worthless to you,

I'm sorry I didn't get into Yale.

I'm sorry I got into one of most best dance school in the world,

I'm sorry I won't even be around to even start it,

I'm sorry I hate life,

I'm sorry I was a crap daughter,

I'm sorry I'm giving up on life at 19,

I'm sorry I'm going to die, leaving only this letter behind,

I'm sorry I never told you I love you,

I'm so fucking sorry.

Yours Sincerely
Daughter