Becemily oneshots// 2018

❤️ coming out ❤️

Chapter Text

Beca's never really been the best at consoling people. She once climbed out of the window of her childhood friend's house because it looked like he was about to start crying. She'd waited for the perfect moment – when he went to get them both a drink from the kitchen – before bolting and running home. It wasn't until she saw him the next day at school, clearly hurt, that she remembered that other people have feelings and it's pretty shitty to pretend they don't, no matter how awkward you feel around them.

Which is why, when Emily shows up at the Bella house in tears, Beca doesn't turn her away. She opens the door and wordlessly lets her inside, waiting until she's in the living room before taking a deep breath and shutting the door.

And there's something unsettling about Emily Junk crying. She's like Chloe, that way. It just doesn't seem right for such a bubbly and loving person to be sad.

Ignoring all the warning signs telling her to leave Emily alone and not get involved with whatever this is, Beca sits on the sofa at a respectable distance from the freshman and takes another deep breath.

"Can I get you anything?" Emily looks at her, wipes her eyes with the back of her hands, and shakes her head. "Okay, um..." Beca trails off. And as much as she hates this, she's not gonna just leave the girl alone while she's crying, so she sits back on the couch and looks around the room until Emily wants to talk.

She thinks it's lucky that the Bellas aren't in the house. They've all gone to the cinema to watch the new Spiderman movie, and Beca had managed to get out of it by faking a call from her father telling her that they're having a family dinner. She thinks that the Bellas being here would make Emily feel worse, and she thinks that one awkward Bella who doesn't know what to say is better to deal with than a group of them, all yelling over each other and asking questions.

Eventually, after way too long sitting in silence on the couch, twiddling their thumbs and occasionally sniffing or yawning, Emily breaks the silence.

"I thought you'd be with the Bellas."

"Movies aren't my thing. Why aren't you with them?"

"I was with my mom."

Beca suspects that maybe that is the reason Emily is so upset, but she doesn't pry.

There's another short silence, and Beca's about to ask if Emily wants a hot chocolate when Emily starts crying again.

"Oh," Beca sits up, moving over to sit beside Emily. "Don't–Don't cry."

She knows that her ability to comfort people is poor, but Emily hasn't ran away in hysterics yet so she figures she's doing okay.

Emily sniffles and wipes her tears on the sleeve of her sweater and Beca is about to go get her a tissue when she feels something weigh her shoulder down. She looks down, and the angle is awkward but Emily is resting her head on Beca's shoulder.

She lifts her arm slowly, draping it over Emily's shoulders, and as much as past-her would love to just push Emily off of her, current-her doesn't want to. Because Emily trusts her enough to be a shoulder to cry on, and she doesn't want to jeopardize that.

She rubs Emily's back and closes her eyes, and she tries not to think about how the sound of Emily's cries makes her stomach turn, and makes her want to fight whatever or whomever has upset her.

Eventually, Emily's crying stops, and she's lifting her head up and wiping the rest of her tears away with her soaked sleeves, and Beca's arm falls to rest on the back of the sofa.

"I'm sorry."

"Hey, no, you don't–you don't have to apologize."

She feels Emily take a deep breath as she stares down at the floor. And Beca reaches a hand out to rest it on Emily's thigh. Chloe does this to her when she's distressed or upset and it seems to help, so maybe it'll help Emily too.

"My mom and I had a fight."

Beca thinks back to the fights she had with her parents back in high school. She wouldn't wish that on anybody.

"I'm sorry, that sucks."

"I came out to her."

Beca frowns, watching the way Emily pulls at the loose strings on the edge of her sweater sleeves. She reaches out a hand, stopping Emily's fiddling, and leaves her hand there, holding onto Emily's. Eventually, their fingers tangle together and Emily squeezes them slightly as she stares down at them.

"You're gay?"

"Bi," Emily whispers. She sounds so small and broken, it breaks Beca's heart.

"And she didn't...like that?"

"No."

Beca takes the quick, short reply as a cue to not pry anymore, so she scoots a little closer and looks at their clasped hands.

"I'm bi too, you know."

Emily looks at her.

"You are?"

"Yep," she says, popping the 'p'.

"Are any of the other Bellas? You know."

"It's not my right to say. But," Beca pauses. Emily is still looking at her, so she looks up, and she's always been a sucker for big brown eyes like Emily's. "You don't need to worry. The Bellas are all so open-minded. We've performed at pride and raised money for LGBT youth and," she clears her throat. "You don't have to be scared to be yourself here. You're one of us. And you're safe."

Emily smiles, and she slowly leans forward until their foreheads are resting against each other.

"You know, for a super awkward nerd, you're not too bad at this whole comforting thing."