Before The Sun Sets (ManxMan)

◾two

2. In the dark cave of his mind.

Adam quickly goes up to get ready for the day, he takes a quick shower because he knows if it wasn't quick he'd end up crying in the bathroom and that's the last thing he wants. He moisturizes and puts on a dark jeans and an oversized salmon jumper. He runs his hand through his damp hair and stares at his bedroom. His marital bedroom. Jensen's clothes were still on the ground, the bed was unmade and the curtains were haphazardly drawn. Everything just seemed off and Adam was suddenly filled with the feeling that he doesn't belong here. The feeling that this is no longer his bedroom.

There was a dark cloud hanging over this room and Adam doesn't know how to clear it. He takes one last look at the room and turns around. He needed to clear his mind and he was also missing his children. He checks the watch on his wrist for the time and sighs when he sees it's just a little past nine. It was still early. Still stupidly early. In some other parts of the world, people were still asleep and Adam suddenly finds himself wishing he was among them.

Sara lets herself in like always. She walks through the short hallway and made her way to the sitting room. Adam was sitting up and staring at the TV but his eyes looked blank and Sara could bet all the Oreos in her purse that her friend wasn't really watching the TV but clearly Ian was enjoying it because he tries to sing along.

"Ian, my darling." She ruffles his hair and smacks a kiss to his cheek.

Ian just bats her hand away and tries to push her away because she was blocking half of his view. Adam laughs at his son's antics and receives a glare from Sara. She rolls her eyes at Ian and walks to the chair Adam was sitting on.

"You feeling better now?" She asks as she takes her seat.

Adam just turns a little and lays down on her lap. His head lays on her lap and she immediately buries her hands into his hair. Adam sighs and turns to bury his face into Sara's tummy and cried. His shoulders shook with the intensity of his tears, he gasps for breathe as he cries his pain and his confusion away.

"Adam..." Sara sniffs. "You have to tell me what's wrong."

Adam takes a deep breath and uses his free hand to wipe the tears away. He takes another deep breathe and let it out. He moves away from Sara's stomach and sits up. He feels a little bit lighter now but he still wants to cry.

"Adam you're not talking and I'm getting scared." Sara says, staring at him in concern.

Adam gives her the best smile he could conjure. "I'm fine. I don't know why I cried. I think its stress or something." Adam tells her. He gets up and walks to the kitchen to finish clearing up. He places the plates in the dishwasher and carefully arranged the pan he used to make the pancakes in before he flicks it on.

Sara walks into the kitchen five minutes after he had left, with Ian on her hip. She places him on his chair and hands him a Rubik's cube. She then turns to Adam who was looking into the microwave and he looked pale.

"Adam, please talk to me. Tell me what's wrong, you're making me scared."

Adam burst into laughter. He was still laughing as he pull the plate of food out of the microwave. On the plate was mixed rice, coleslaw and a large drumstick. This was last night's dinner. This was Jensen's dinner.

Adam was still laughing as he drops the plate on the tale and let the rank smell fill the kitchen. Immediately Ian smelt it, he started crying. Sara moves first. She takes him back to the sitting room and literally ran to the kitchen.

"What is going on, Adam?"

Adam looks away from the plate to his friend. "He didn't eat my food."